Snum has to get glasses.
:'( I know! But she'll still look nice, I'm sure.
So Osh and I are walking down to the gate and Snum's wailing over the phone about her glasses news.
I mention to Osh whats going on.
What she says next astounds me.
"Eleven grand ya. They're gonna cost eleven grand."
I stare at her with disbelief written right accross my forehead. She continues.
"Cheapest. Cheapest you'll get is that."
More staring. Snum wails in the background.
"The glasses. Thats whats expensive. More than the frames."
Disbelief.
"Really. Im being serious. I wear glasses no? Eleven grand. Minimum."
I begin to think that people with glasses must be really rich.
Osh is getting really ridiculous now, and I mention to Snum whats going on. I wait while she stares in disbelief.
I decide to get Osh to explain.
"The actual glass part will cost you around 600. And the frames will be 500."
Apparently, thats eleven grand.
Note to Self: Dont ever accept financial advice from Osh.
Tuesday, February 27, 2007
Sunday, February 25, 2007
Bestest Said...
Bestest said
"We live in different universes. Imagine all the things I could see if I saw through your mind, or if you saw through mine..."
"We live in different universes. Imagine all the things I could see if I saw through your mind, or if you saw through mine..."
Thursday, February 22, 2007
On the Back of a Bike
... that me and Snum saw today was pasted the words:
"My death on road."
In colourful letters.
The weirdness, I tell you.
What, does he want to die in some accident?
Is he saying his bike is a personification of death? Very poorly put, if thats the case.
Weird.
"My death on road."
In colourful letters.
The weirdness, I tell you.
What, does he want to die in some accident?
Is he saying his bike is a personification of death? Very poorly put, if thats the case.
Weird.
Oshsays VI- Arabian Nights
She said:
"No, I mean those, Arabian Goodnight Stories."
and
"...in that Ali Baba and the Forty Chors."
"No, I mean those, Arabian Goodnight Stories."
and
"...in that Ali Baba and the Forty Chors."
Sunday, February 18, 2007
Bestest and MM Home Truths
It is, in fact, impossible to study. The conditions under which this glorious activity does take place, however, is as follows:
1. It HAS to be 10pm or later in the night.
2. There HAS to be an exam the next day.
1. It HAS to be 10pm or later in the night.
2. There HAS to be an exam the next day.
Oshsays- V Text Message
Osho is cryptic even in her text messages.
This is what she sent me:
Oh oh! Perhaps she meant "Fun, child, is out of the question"!
Ooo I'm brilliant arent I?
Wonder what purpose the Tn served.
Have a nice day, she says, the sweetheart.
Well, whatever she meant, this message is crazy enough to go down as an Oshsay.
She's just given a dance performance (multitalented my little Osh is)
Must hear all about it college. Perhaps we'll get a few more Oshsays!
Till then! :-)
This is what she sent me:
Fun baccha. .Is out of ?Tn. .Yeah. .U 2 hv a nice day!
Oh oh! Perhaps she meant "Fun, child, is out of the question"!
Ooo I'm brilliant arent I?
Wonder what purpose the Tn served.
Have a nice day, she says, the sweetheart.
Well, whatever she meant, this message is crazy enough to go down as an Oshsay.
She's just given a dance performance (multitalented my little Osh is)
Must hear all about it college. Perhaps we'll get a few more Oshsays!
Till then! :-)
Wednesday, February 14, 2007
Oshsays IV- Media seminar
Today we had a media seminar.
Yesterday also.
9 to4.
Print, Radio, TV, Film.
Do I sound dead?
Yes, well thats because I almost did die, of boredom despite all the efforts the third years took. I'm sorry, but seminars will be boring, no matter who conducts them.
Thank god for Osh and her Says.
Today was Valentines Day. I dont know why everyone was making such a big deal of it. I've never paid much attention to it.
Did you know that if you wear pink today, it means that you are accepting proposals, and if you wear black it means you're rejecting them?
Silly really. Depends on who proposes, doesnt it? What if someone you really dont like asks you out, and you happen to be wearing pink, because you thought the guy you did like was going to ask you? Puts you in a rather sticky situation, doesnt it, if you follow that logic?
Personally I think all this proposing business is particularly dumb not to mention awkward and embarrassing. But its what the world does, so whatever.
Anyway, Osho was telling us this useful nugget of information, just as I was thinking what I lovely shade of pink her salwar was.
I voiced my thoughts.
She gave me a glare.
No, she said, it was lavendar.
Snum and I exchanged an evil glance.
Ha! Osho was getting hysterical about a small thing again. (She does this from time to time.) What fun it would be to pull her leg a little!
"No, Osh." said Snum in her best I-know-what-I'm-talking-about voice. "That shade is very definitely a pink. Very pretty it is though."
Osh gave her a glare.
"Lavender. Its lavender. How can lavender be pink."
Snum continued "No, thats really pink Osh, lavender you know, is a light purple shade, see?"
And then came our first Oshsay:
Said very quickly and in a pissed off tone:
"Lavender, let me tell you, falls under the violet category. You know, crimson? If you mix crimson and navy blue, when you mix the two, thats when you get this particular shade called as lavender, okay?"
We laughed a bit at her, and then, since we were dead bored, the discussion led to music. Osh was doing pretty well actually. She was making sense and everything.
Unfortunately she went on to pronounce two majorly famous artistes' names completely wrong.
a. Christina Aguilera.
The Oshsay was: "Christiana Aguilera."
Her arguement was that in an autograph of hers that Osh has, Christina's spelt her name like that.
Snum and I told her that Christina must have just not cared about the spelling of her name enough to stall herself in her desperate rush to get the hell away from Osho, and this comment unfortunately, did not go down too well with dear Osh.
b. Enrique Iglesias.
The Oshsay was: "Enrique Igarius."
And no amount of screaming would change her mind.
In her anger, she said "You people need to get your ears waxed!"
At least we thought she said that.
Apparently, she'd said "You people need to get your ear wax removed."
As we were laughing about that one, she screamed "You twits! Whats wrong with you? Do you remember one end of the sentence and the other end and forget everything in between???"
Snum and I were too deep in hysterics to stop there, so I got out a sheet of paper to write down all the Oshsays we were getting and sat poised as if to take notes.
This angered Osho. She grabbed at the sheet of paper. Deftly, I snatched it out of reach. She caught hold of my kurta by mistake instead, and said "Madhu, if you dont give that sheet to me, Im going to rip your clothes off!"
...and was highly embarrassed after.
After Snum and I had laughed and told her to "Control yourself Osho! For pity's sake!" enough number of times, she settled down to complain about her existance in the kitchen blog.
First she said, in an angry voice "What will my children think?"
I ferociously scribbled into the paper while Snum laughed at Osho's indignance.
"You're making me a public property!"
Scribble scribble. Giggle giggle.
"You're barging into my privacy!"
Scribble scribble. Giggle giggle.
And she ended with a vehement
"I will take you to court!"
Despite her occassional Oshsays though, Osh is really smart. Very clever kid. And she is very very sweet. :-)
Special Note: The number of Oshsays heard by Snum today, I'm sorry to say has had a rather bad influence on her own speaking abilities.
The first recorded Snumsay was made today: "What feelingless people!" she said shaking her fists at the speakers who WOULD JUST NOT STOP.
Silly Snum. :-)
Yesterday also.
9 to4.
Print, Radio, TV, Film.
Do I sound dead?
Yes, well thats because I almost did die, of boredom despite all the efforts the third years took. I'm sorry, but seminars will be boring, no matter who conducts them.
Thank god for Osh and her Says.
Today was Valentines Day. I dont know why everyone was making such a big deal of it. I've never paid much attention to it.
Did you know that if you wear pink today, it means that you are accepting proposals, and if you wear black it means you're rejecting them?
Silly really. Depends on who proposes, doesnt it? What if someone you really dont like asks you out, and you happen to be wearing pink, because you thought the guy you did like was going to ask you? Puts you in a rather sticky situation, doesnt it, if you follow that logic?
Personally I think all this proposing business is particularly dumb not to mention awkward and embarrassing. But its what the world does, so whatever.
Anyway, Osho was telling us this useful nugget of information, just as I was thinking what I lovely shade of pink her salwar was.
I voiced my thoughts.
She gave me a glare.
No, she said, it was lavendar.
Snum and I exchanged an evil glance.
Ha! Osho was getting hysterical about a small thing again. (She does this from time to time.) What fun it would be to pull her leg a little!
"No, Osh." said Snum in her best I-know-what-I'm-talking-about voice. "That shade is very definitely a pink. Very pretty it is though."
Osh gave her a glare.
"Lavender. Its lavender. How can lavender be pink."
Snum continued "No, thats really pink Osh, lavender you know, is a light purple shade, see?"
And then came our first Oshsay:
Said very quickly and in a pissed off tone:
"Lavender, let me tell you, falls under the violet category. You know, crimson? If you mix crimson and navy blue, when you mix the two, thats when you get this particular shade called as lavender, okay?"
We laughed a bit at her, and then, since we were dead bored, the discussion led to music. Osh was doing pretty well actually. She was making sense and everything.
Unfortunately she went on to pronounce two majorly famous artistes' names completely wrong.
a. Christina Aguilera.
The Oshsay was: "Christiana Aguilera."
Her arguement was that in an autograph of hers that Osh has, Christina's spelt her name like that.
Snum and I told her that Christina must have just not cared about the spelling of her name enough to stall herself in her desperate rush to get the hell away from Osho, and this comment unfortunately, did not go down too well with dear Osh.
b. Enrique Iglesias.
The Oshsay was: "Enrique Igarius."
And no amount of screaming would change her mind.
In her anger, she said "You people need to get your ears waxed!"
At least we thought she said that.
Apparently, she'd said "You people need to get your ear wax removed."
As we were laughing about that one, she screamed "You twits! Whats wrong with you? Do you remember one end of the sentence and the other end and forget everything in between???"
Snum and I were too deep in hysterics to stop there, so I got out a sheet of paper to write down all the Oshsays we were getting and sat poised as if to take notes.
This angered Osho. She grabbed at the sheet of paper. Deftly, I snatched it out of reach. She caught hold of my kurta by mistake instead, and said "Madhu, if you dont give that sheet to me, Im going to rip your clothes off!"
...and was highly embarrassed after.
After Snum and I had laughed and told her to "Control yourself Osho! For pity's sake!" enough number of times, she settled down to complain about her existance in the kitchen blog.
First she said, in an angry voice "What will my children think?"
I ferociously scribbled into the paper while Snum laughed at Osho's indignance.
"You're making me a public property!"
Scribble scribble. Giggle giggle.
"You're barging into my privacy!"
Scribble scribble. Giggle giggle.
And she ended with a vehement
"I will take you to court!"
Despite her occassional Oshsays though, Osh is really smart. Very clever kid. And she is very very sweet. :-)
Special Note: The number of Oshsays heard by Snum today, I'm sorry to say has had a rather bad influence on her own speaking abilities.
The first recorded Snumsay was made today: "What feelingless people!" she said shaking her fists at the speakers who WOULD JUST NOT STOP.
Silly Snum. :-)
Friday, February 9, 2007
Oshsays III
Wondering why the heading hasnt changed?
Well, its just that everyone's just gotten too used to Oshsays. Very reluctant they all are, to call them Oshisms. And who am I to tell them what to call these oh so amusing nuggets of wisdom?
So, Oshsays they will remain.
Here are a few more:
1. "Why am I being debated upon my vocabulary?"
2. "My paper was really bad! I've just written things in random succession!"
3. "Okay okay. My grammatical sense makes no sense."
Recorded at: the MM-unfriendly Casa Picola restaurant where me and Zz have decided to go again only after we start earning (and probably not even then).
Well, its just that everyone's just gotten too used to Oshsays. Very reluctant they all are, to call them Oshisms. And who am I to tell them what to call these oh so amusing nuggets of wisdom?
So, Oshsays they will remain.
Here are a few more:
1. "Why am I being debated upon my vocabulary?"
2. "My paper was really bad! I've just written things in random succession!"
3. "Okay okay. My grammatical sense makes no sense."
Recorded at: the MM-unfriendly Casa Picola restaurant where me and Zz have decided to go again only after we start earning (and probably not even then).
Tuesday, February 6, 2007
Nonsense
Forgive me, but apart from seeing peoples faces in cars, I also have the habit of seeing animals in peoples faces.
Sheryl Crowe. What does she remind you of, which animal? Dont read further, just take a minute and choose...
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
A HORSE!
Doesnt she remind you of a horse? Come on, Bestest... Doesnt she?
I was just listening to her songs. Thats when the thought popped into my head.
Great voice she's got.
________________________________________________________________________
As does Norah Jones. Sigh, what would we have done without Norah Jones? I got a few of her songs. Ones I havent heard before. So, so nice.
________________________________________________________________________
I met Garfield yesterday. Well, at least I met a fat orange LAZY cat on my way back from college. It was walking across the sunny road. S l o w l y. We had to wait for his royal highness to pass before we could move on. I wanted to stop and chat. But I could see he wasnt up to it.
________________________________________________________________________
I've mentioned the sun before, havent I? I mean at how beautiful sunlight can be?
How indescribable it feels against your back on a cold cold day, how you could just fall asleep, like that, standing up, feeling so comfortable.
Perhaps thats why Garfield was walking so slowly. He wanted to enjoy the sunlight for a few minutes before his next snooze.
________________________________________________________________________
Have you seen the cat in Problem Child? Hahahaha. Oh that movie is so funny, and so cute! hahahaha... The cat, junior breaks its legs or something by "mistake", and both its front legs are in casts, and the way it walks accross the lawn is so hilarious! Oh god, I'm laughing just thinking about that cat!
I know you dont like the movie Bestest, but cats can be funny too, you know, in addition to geese and llamas. :D
________________________________________________________________________
My favourite part of that movie is the next door neighbour girl's party. You know, where Junior is dressed as a devil, and all the kids gang up on him, so he throws all her presents into the swimming pool (which is of course, unnoticed until later on) and sets up the sprinkler in her room and stuff.
The girl, is very very perfect for the role. Its a fancy dress party, and she's dressed as a flower, oh gosh, Im laughing again, and they're playing this song "Its my Party and I'll cry if I want to!" and she's crying and throwing tantrums and juniors all smiling and looking evil about it.
Hahaha oh, that part really worked. Thats my favourite part of the movie.
________________________________________________________________________
I won a fancy dress competetion when I was 5. My mum made the costume, and I was a fairy :) hee hee. My first taste of success. My parents had the certificate framed. Well they put it into this frame we already had.
________________________________________________________________________
You know, KBC is starting to work with Shah Rukh in it. Im beginning to like him, as a host, not as Shah Rukh (because I didnt much like him as Shah Rukh to begin with). He's doing well. He's very likeable. And funny. The B wasnt funny. He is. I like.
________________________________________________________________________
Missed an exam because of the bandh. Of course it'll be later. Just thought Id mention why Im here on a Tuesday at 3:00...
oh my GOD!
Its 5?????
Where the hell did all the time go???
Sheeesh!
________________________________________________________________________
Sheryl Crowe. What does she remind you of, which animal? Dont read further, just take a minute and choose....
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
A HORSE!
Doesnt she remind you of a horse? Come on, Bestest... Doesnt she?
I was just listening to her songs. Thats when the thought popped into my head.
Great voice she's got.
________________________________________________________________________
As does Norah Jones. Sigh, what would we have done without Norah Jones? I got a few of her songs. Ones I havent heard before. So, so nice.
________________________________________________________________________
I met Garfield yesterday. Well, at least I met a fat orange LAZY cat on my way back from college. It was walking across the sunny road. S l o w l y. We had to wait for his royal highness to pass before we could move on. I wanted to stop and chat. But I could see he wasnt up to it.
________________________________________________________________________
I've mentioned the sun before, havent I? I mean at how beautiful sunlight can be?
How indescribable it feels against your back on a cold cold day, how you could just fall asleep, like that, standing up, feeling so comfortable.
Perhaps thats why Garfield was walking so slowly. He wanted to enjoy the sunlight for a few minutes before his next snooze.
________________________________________________________________________
Have you seen the cat in Problem Child? Hahahaha. Oh that movie is so funny, and so cute! hahahaha... The cat, junior breaks its legs or something by "mistake", and both its front legs are in casts, and the way it walks accross the lawn is so hilarious! Oh god, I'm laughing just thinking about that cat!
I know you dont like the movie Bestest, but cats can be funny too, you know, in addition to geese and llamas. :D
________________________________________________________________________
My favourite part of that movie is the next door neighbour girl's party. You know, where Junior is dressed as a devil, and all the kids gang up on him, so he throws all her presents into the swimming pool (which is of course, unnoticed until later on) and sets up the sprinkler in her room and stuff.
The girl, is very very perfect for the role. Its a fancy dress party, and she's dressed as a flower, oh gosh, Im laughing again, and they're playing this song "Its my Party and I'll cry if I want to!" and she's crying and throwing tantrums and juniors all smiling and looking evil about it.
Hahaha oh, that part really worked. Thats my favourite part of the movie.
________________________________________________________________________
I won a fancy dress competetion when I was 5. My mum made the costume, and I was a fairy :) hee hee. My first taste of success. My parents had the certificate framed. Well they put it into this frame we already had.
________________________________________________________________________
You know, KBC is starting to work with Shah Rukh in it. Im beginning to like him, as a host, not as Shah Rukh (because I didnt much like him as Shah Rukh to begin with). He's doing well. He's very likeable. And funny. The B wasnt funny. He is. I like.
________________________________________________________________________
Missed an exam because of the bandh. Of course it'll be later. Just thought Id mention why Im here on a Tuesday at 3:00...
oh my GOD!
Its 5?????
Where the hell did all the time go???
Sheeesh!
________________________________________________________________________
Oshsays II
Well, I consulted a few experts. (alright, alright, they were just Snum and Zz)
And we came up with other possible ideas for a name for things that Osh says.
Even Osh, in her excitement, came up with a few:
1. Oshisms (Snum)
2. Oshisasisms (becasue we got confused)
3. Oshisamasisms (Osh wrote that one down)
I've decided to stick with snum's.
Because it sounds the most sane, and we want to give that illusion to people.
Then they can just be even more shocked at the entire insanity of them all.
So Oshisms it is.
And we came up with other possible ideas for a name for things that Osh says.
Even Osh, in her excitement, came up with a few:
1. Oshisms (Snum)
2. Oshisasisms (becasue we got confused)
3. Oshisamasisms (Osh wrote that one down)
I've decided to stick with snum's.
Because it sounds the most sane, and we want to give that illusion to people.
Then they can just be even more shocked at the entire insanity of them all.
So Oshisms it is.
Friday, January 26, 2007
Oshsays
There are loads of them. Oshsays.
You know, things that Osh says.
Yes, yes. I know.
I could have picked a better name. I could have.
But I've been calling them Oshsays in my head for so long now, that nothing else seems right.
Oh, I just love Osh. She is just so funny. She's smart, and very articulate. She has words in her vocab that I might have heard of, but would never think to put in a sentence.
And she's brilliant at spur of the moment public speeches.
Lascivious mouth.
Thats what she said in the spur of the moment speech in PK's class, remember Snum? When we were asked to make that presentation that we were so unwilling to do and hence did not prepare for at all? He literally had to force us on stage. Well, we got through it and even managed to scrape a Good Job! at the end of the day,
but even in our endless joy at the ordeal all being over, we were dumbfounded at Osh's abilities.
Osh is... why am I explaining Osh to you?
You know Osh.
Perhaps its because I hope to get a little... ahem... monetary renumeration? (refer Sudden Sleepover point 7)
Anyway its all in the way she speaks. She speaks brilliantly. The Oshsays are missing a critical element if you arent hearing her say them.
Here are some of them.
1. I'm too bored to yawn.
Her expression added to the effect. We were in 4E's class. Great teacher he is. He was showing us around the college. Describing structures to us. The architecture and the sculptures.
Whats that? Oh, it was communicative english class. (look that says, that should answer all your questions)
It was my second time around, so you can forgive me for not paying attention. The other batch hadnt done this yet. All this was new to Osh. And that is when she made her assessment of the class with our first little Oshsay.
2.We'd taken to narrating funny little incidents to each other in order to pass time. This was one Osho's.
"Jay told me a joke which was not remotely funny. I said to him, I said " If you think that was funny, then I certainly need to think."
.
.
:-|
.
.
(insert confused expression)
Absurd she is. :D How I do love her. So much fun. :)
You know, things that Osh says.
Yes, yes. I know.
I could have picked a better name. I could have.
But I've been calling them Oshsays in my head for so long now, that nothing else seems right.
Oh, I just love Osh. She is just so funny. She's smart, and very articulate. She has words in her vocab that I might have heard of, but would never think to put in a sentence.
And she's brilliant at spur of the moment public speeches.
Lascivious mouth.
Thats what she said in the spur of the moment speech in PK's class, remember Snum? When we were asked to make that presentation that we were so unwilling to do and hence did not prepare for at all? He literally had to force us on stage. Well, we got through it and even managed to scrape a Good Job! at the end of the day,
but even in our endless joy at the ordeal all being over, we were dumbfounded at Osh's abilities.
Osh is... why am I explaining Osh to you?
You know Osh.
Perhaps its because I hope to get a little... ahem... monetary renumeration? (refer Sudden Sleepover point 7)
Anyway its all in the way she speaks. She speaks brilliantly. The Oshsays are missing a critical element if you arent hearing her say them.
Here are some of them.
1. I'm too bored to yawn.
Her expression added to the effect. We were in 4E's class. Great teacher he is. He was showing us around the college. Describing structures to us. The architecture and the sculptures.
Whats that? Oh, it was communicative english class. (look that says, that should answer all your questions)
It was my second time around, so you can forgive me for not paying attention. The other batch hadnt done this yet. All this was new to Osh. And that is when she made her assessment of the class with our first little Oshsay.
2.We'd taken to narrating funny little incidents to each other in order to pass time. This was one Osho's.
"Jay told me a joke which was not remotely funny. I said to him, I said " If you think that was funny, then I certainly need to think."
.
.
:-|
.
.
(insert confused expression)
Absurd she is. :D How I do love her. So much fun. :)
Saturday, January 20, 2007
Reality TV. How Real?
I love The Apprentice.
For all you ignorant bums referred to in my earlier post, it is a reality series that... oh, just go google it.
I love the show. Just my kinda thing. I love the teams, the strategies, the justice. Don't you just love it? How can someone not enjoy the Apprentice? Gives me a high. A rush, to see who deserved to be fired, get fired, and see those who didnt, . . . er, not be.
Well, for quite sometime, I've been thinking. How real is it all?
And by quite sometime, I mean today, after I watched it.
Its so very easy to edit these kinds of shows. Is what we see ALL thats really going on?
The reason I got to thinking, was that this season, for the first two episodes, I noticed that the person I really badly wanted Mr Trump to fire, did in fact get fired. The person I wanted him to reprimand, was in fact reprimanded. The one whose values I liked, and wanted him to praise, he did in fact praise.
It wasn't like that in the first two seasons at all. Alma Rosa, or whatever that freak in the first season was called, didnt get fired till almost the very end.
At first, on observing this, I thought, "Oh my goodness. Business has suddenly become my calling. I must get a letter pad and envelope and apply to the Trump Organisation immediately. How they will rejoice on finding someone who echoes Mr Trump's sentiments exactly!"
But a saner voice inside my head told me to think about it for a second you darned nut.
And I did.
My opinions were made on the basis of what I saw. What I saw, was decided upon by the editors.
Its been quite a few years since the first season. What if by now, they've wisened up?
What if, the editors wait (lurking about in dingy corners and alleys, if you like), to see who Mr Trump fires, and then work the entire editting around playing up that person's stupidities, so that the viewers want him fired, and so that when he finally is, they get their finish-of-the-episode rush, end up feeling all triumphant and endorphin-filled, and thus get operently conditioned into watching the series again?
Its all very possible you know.
Also, candidates who are actually behaving ridiculously, but who Trump doesnt seem to realise are, could be in on a cover up.
(That line does not make sense. Let me re-phrase.)
Their behaviour could be being masked, so that viewers arent angry that this hasnt been acknowledged, and dont feel like not watching the series again.
(Whoa. Now thats something even you can understand, isnt it? . . . NOT. I've confused even myself there. Lets try again.)
A candidate's bad behaviour might not be shown on air, if Mr Trump hasnt acknowledged and condemned the behaviour. This way, the viewers dont feel indignant that it was overlooked. Instead, they feel happy that everything turned out the way they wanted it to, the way it should be. Thus, having experienced such triumphant feelings, they are eager to watch the show again. Ratings go up. Producers make money. Sneaky skulking little editors in their dingy alleys are paid for all their efforts. Everybody's happy.
But then its not right is it? Not real.
I dont know. I could be totally wrong. There've only been 2 episodes. I'll watch the rest of them before I make up my mind.
For all you ignorant bums referred to in my earlier post, it is a reality series that... oh, just go google it.
I love the show. Just my kinda thing. I love the teams, the strategies, the justice. Don't you just love it? How can someone not enjoy the Apprentice? Gives me a high. A rush, to see who deserved to be fired, get fired, and see those who didnt, . . . er, not be.
Well, for quite sometime, I've been thinking. How real is it all?
And by quite sometime, I mean today, after I watched it.
Its so very easy to edit these kinds of shows. Is what we see ALL thats really going on?
The reason I got to thinking, was that this season, for the first two episodes, I noticed that the person I really badly wanted Mr Trump to fire, did in fact get fired. The person I wanted him to reprimand, was in fact reprimanded. The one whose values I liked, and wanted him to praise, he did in fact praise.
It wasn't like that in the first two seasons at all. Alma Rosa, or whatever that freak in the first season was called, didnt get fired till almost the very end.
At first, on observing this, I thought, "Oh my goodness. Business has suddenly become my calling. I must get a letter pad and envelope and apply to the Trump Organisation immediately. How they will rejoice on finding someone who echoes Mr Trump's sentiments exactly!"
But a saner voice inside my head told me to think about it for a second you darned nut.
And I did.
My opinions were made on the basis of what I saw. What I saw, was decided upon by the editors.
Its been quite a few years since the first season. What if by now, they've wisened up?
What if, the editors wait (lurking about in dingy corners and alleys, if you like), to see who Mr Trump fires, and then work the entire editting around playing up that person's stupidities, so that the viewers want him fired, and so that when he finally is, they get their finish-of-the-episode rush, end up feeling all triumphant and endorphin-filled, and thus get operently conditioned into watching the series again?
Its all very possible you know.
Also, candidates who are actually behaving ridiculously, but who Trump doesnt seem to realise are, could be in on a cover up.
(That line does not make sense. Let me re-phrase.)
Their behaviour could be being masked, so that viewers arent angry that this hasnt been acknowledged, and dont feel like not watching the series again.
(Whoa. Now thats something even you can understand, isnt it? . . . NOT. I've confused even myself there. Lets try again.)
A candidate's bad behaviour might not be shown on air, if Mr Trump hasnt acknowledged and condemned the behaviour. This way, the viewers dont feel indignant that it was overlooked. Instead, they feel happy that everything turned out the way they wanted it to, the way it should be. Thus, having experienced such triumphant feelings, they are eager to watch the show again. Ratings go up. Producers make money. Sneaky skulking little editors in their dingy alleys are paid for all their efforts. Everybody's happy.
But then its not right is it? Not real.
I dont know. I could be totally wrong. There've only been 2 episodes. I'll watch the rest of them before I make up my mind.
A Zz and me Bit: The Zz Code
You havent heard of it?
What... seriously?
Which planet, precisely do you live on?
Rolls eyes and mutters for a bit about how dumb people are getting.
Okay, okay. I forgive you for your ignorance.
Possibly its just that Zz doesnt message you. (Incredulous look that says very clearly,"Yes, there is a high probability that you belong to that 2% of the population.")
Shakes head at what the world is coming to. I mean, we were dumb enough as it was, with all those american duffers we see on TV consistituing such a large portion of the world's population, without people in the vicinity displaying their ignorance with such panache.
Shakes self and decides to move on in the fear that she has lost the attention of the reader already (attention spans these days, god, don't get me started...)
The Zz code.
Or Da Zz Code.
Whichever you prefer.
Yes. Allow me to explain.
Zz gets a hundred free messages a day.
Evidently, that is not enough.
Evidently.
At around eight o' clock, she begins the process.
(Play MI music in background)
A missed call is given from Zz's phone to MM's.
Ta na na na, Ta na na na, Ta na na na na. (Thats the nokia ring tone. Not Bond Music, if you're confused. Its not MI music either. The MI music is playing in the background.)
MM looks up from her work (which is of high importance, I assure you). She's heard the cue. Now its all up to her. With cat-like agility, she swiftly searches the room for her phone, which she has left somewhere to cry alone, as usual, at how neglected it is.
After a few minutes, in which her room is ransacked to the point of it looking like a tsunami diaster area, she finds her phone. It is in her bag.
A sigh of relief is heaved. There's still time.
The keypad is unlocked.
A message is quickly typed out. (Using dictionary of course, so time saving it is.)
A quick re read, and the message is sent off to Zz.
The Code is complete.
In case you were wondering what the hell that was all about,
Please await in the post, your introductory letter, which describes the initiation process you are required to undergo. In the mean time, buy yourself some rope and a large jar of honey. This will come in very handy as you will later come to find ou...
...Oh... I'm sorry. I dont know whats gotten into me. I seem to be in a very bad mood today. You are not an idiot. I assure you. Its just me. Really it is.
So what if you dont understand plain English? Doesnt mean you're stupid or anything...
Oops there I go again. I must really stop being so condescending, shouldnt I?
I should go on with my slightly pointless little story.
Its perfectly alright that you didnt understand. I shall explain in slightly less complicated terms. Now pay attention, and perhaps you will be able to comprehend... I mean, get, what I'm saying.
SMS conversation:
Yesterday, 8.03pm
Zz has finished her day's free messages.
MM (very put on, very fake look of surprise) has not.
Zz: Ta na na na, Ta na na na, Ta na na na na.
MM: Messages over I suppose?
Zz: Ta na na na, Ta na na na, Ta na na na na.
MM: I thought as much, I did.
Zz: Ta na na na, Ta na na na, Ta na na na na.
MM: Why yes, thank you. I have had dinner. Scrumptious meal of rice, sambar and beans laced with coconut. And what about you?
Zz: Ta na na na, Ta na na na, Ta na na na na.
MM: Ooo sounds YUM! Ask your mum to send some to college some day.
Zz: Ta na na na, Ta na na na, Ta na na na na.
MM: Dang it. If only I were non veggie.
Zz: Ta na na na, Ta na na na, Ta na na na na.
MM: Okay, okay! I'll put my songs in a cd for you. You dont have to be all naggy about it.
Zz: Ta na na na, Ta na na na, Ta na na na na.
MM: The CD doesnt have enough space for five hundred and thirty songs you silly goose. I'll put in as much as I can.
Zz: Ta na na na, Ta na na na, Ta na na na na.
MM: AND the sleep over photos, yes. Grumble grumble. The stuff I do for you. Grumble.
Zz: Ta na na na, Ta na na na, Ta na na na na.
MM: Alright. I've stopped grumbling. Are you happy now? Mutter mutter. CD's almost done.
Zz: Ta na na na, Ta na na na, Ta n
MM: Yawn. Yes, I'm sleeepy too. Well I'll catch ya tomorrow.
Zz: Ta na na na, Ta na na na, Ta na na na NA!
MM: Sigh. I wont forget the cd. Nag, nag, nag.
10.04 pm.
The code is complete.
Now besides all this being very fun for me, the reason I play along with the whole Zz code thing, is because I'm terribly jobless, not to mention psychologically imbalanced. And because, well, I like Zz, despite all the insane tricks she pulls. And also, because its mysterious. It is a code after all. Who doesnt want to be part of a mysterious code? I for one, do.
What... seriously?
Which planet, precisely do you live on?
Rolls eyes and mutters for a bit about how dumb people are getting.
Okay, okay. I forgive you for your ignorance.
Possibly its just that Zz doesnt message you. (Incredulous look that says very clearly,"Yes, there is a high probability that you belong to that 2% of the population.")
Shakes head at what the world is coming to. I mean, we were dumb enough as it was, with all those american duffers we see on TV consistituing such a large portion of the world's population, without people in the vicinity displaying their ignorance with such panache.
Shakes self and decides to move on in the fear that she has lost the attention of the reader already (attention spans these days, god, don't get me started...)
The Zz code.
Or Da Zz Code.
Whichever you prefer.
Yes. Allow me to explain.
Zz gets a hundred free messages a day.
Evidently, that is not enough.
Evidently.
At around eight o' clock, she begins the process.
(Play MI music in background)
A missed call is given from Zz's phone to MM's.
Ta na na na, Ta na na na, Ta na na na na. (Thats the nokia ring tone. Not Bond Music, if you're confused. Its not MI music either. The MI music is playing in the background.)
MM looks up from her work (which is of high importance, I assure you). She's heard the cue. Now its all up to her. With cat-like agility, she swiftly searches the room for her phone, which she has left somewhere to cry alone, as usual, at how neglected it is.
After a few minutes, in which her room is ransacked to the point of it looking like a tsunami diaster area, she finds her phone. It is in her bag.
A sigh of relief is heaved. There's still time.
The keypad is unlocked.
A message is quickly typed out. (Using dictionary of course, so time saving it is.)
A quick re read, and the message is sent off to Zz.
The Code is complete.
In case you were wondering what the hell that was all about,
Congratulations!
You now belong to the covetted group that forms The World's Most Blithering Idiots.Please await in the post, your introductory letter, which describes the initiation process you are required to undergo. In the mean time, buy yourself some rope and a large jar of honey. This will come in very handy as you will later come to find ou...
...Oh... I'm sorry. I dont know whats gotten into me. I seem to be in a very bad mood today. You are not an idiot. I assure you. Its just me. Really it is.
So what if you dont understand plain English? Doesnt mean you're stupid or anything...
Oops there I go again. I must really stop being so condescending, shouldnt I?
I should go on with my slightly pointless little story.
Its perfectly alright that you didnt understand. I shall explain in slightly less complicated terms. Now pay attention, and perhaps you will be able to comprehend... I mean, get, what I'm saying.
SMS conversation:
Yesterday, 8.03pm
Zz has finished her day's free messages.
MM (very put on, very fake look of surprise) has not.
Zz: Ta na na na, Ta na na na, Ta na na na na.
MM: Messages over I suppose?
Zz: Ta na na na, Ta na na na, Ta na na na na.
MM: I thought as much, I did.
Zz: Ta na na na, Ta na na na, Ta na na na na.
MM: Why yes, thank you. I have had dinner. Scrumptious meal of rice, sambar and beans laced with coconut. And what about you?
Zz: Ta na na na, Ta na na na, Ta na na na na.
MM: Ooo sounds YUM! Ask your mum to send some to college some day.
Zz: Ta na na na, Ta na na na, Ta na na na na.
MM: Dang it. If only I were non veggie.
Zz: Ta na na na, Ta na na na, Ta na na na na.
MM: Okay, okay! I'll put my songs in a cd for you. You dont have to be all naggy about it.
Zz: Ta na na na, Ta na na na, Ta na na na na.
MM: The CD doesnt have enough space for five hundred and thirty songs you silly goose. I'll put in as much as I can.
Zz: Ta na na na, Ta na na na, Ta na na na na.
MM: AND the sleep over photos, yes. Grumble grumble. The stuff I do for you. Grumble.
Zz: Ta na na na, Ta na na na, Ta na na na na.
MM: Alright. I've stopped grumbling. Are you happy now? Mutter mutter. CD's almost done.
Zz: Ta na na na, Ta na na na, Ta n
MM: Yawn. Yes, I'm sleeepy too. Well I'll catch ya tomorrow.
Zz: Ta na na na, Ta na na na, Ta na na na NA!
MM: Sigh. I wont forget the cd. Nag, nag, nag.
10.04 pm.
The code is complete.
Now besides all this being very fun for me, the reason I play along with the whole Zz code thing, is because I'm terribly jobless, not to mention psychologically imbalanced. And because, well, I like Zz, despite all the insane tricks she pulls. And also, because its mysterious. It is a code after all. Who doesnt want to be part of a mysterious code? I for one, do.
Tuesday, January 16, 2007
Sigh
Isn't that beautiful? We were dune bashing in the desert, and they stopped for a break, and so that we could take photos while the sun was setting. It looks not so, but it was terribly cold. The sand felt almost like ice cold talcum powder. Wind speeds were incredible. We had to make sure we were standing against the wind while taking photos, because if sand gets into the lens of your camera, you might as well bury the whole camera right there in the sand. Damages it completely. I took a video of the sun setting. People later said that watching it was the most boring 6 minutes of their lives. (Okay, so I'm not a prodigial film maker :-P) But gosh, when it was happening there for real... sigh... just... beautiful.
Monday, January 15, 2007
Winnie-the-Pooh-Related Jargon
1. "I suspitionate that something's very wrong."
A tigger dialogue Zz and I came accross during Bookmark (was that not the best fun?). We have incorporated this very thouroughly into our own vocabularies.
2. "Its so nice to know that your chocolate sauce and milk get along, just when you want them to."
A bestest dialogue, so worthy of the Bear-Of-Little-Brain, I had to smile feeling all fuzzy and content inside, and put it in the clog. :-)
3. "Exactically." - one I just remembered.
A tigger dialogue Zz and I came accross during Bookmark (was that not the best fun?). We have incorporated this very thouroughly into our own vocabularies.
2. "Its so nice to know that your chocolate sauce and milk get along, just when you want them to."
A bestest dialogue, so worthy of the Bear-Of-Little-Brain, I had to smile feeling all fuzzy and content inside, and put it in the clog. :-)
3. "Exactically." - one I just remembered.
Tuesday, January 9, 2007
Sudden Sleepover
Thats what we had on Sunday. Well sudden it was for me at least. Snum's parents were over in Bangalore from Hisar, and trying to get out as much as she could from their visit is something the typical snum would do.
So she called 10 friends over for dinner. Her mother of course (poor dear) would have to cook.
Thing is, Snum lives on the other side of the universe. So I was pretty much resigned to the fact that I wouldn't be going. Until 7.30pm that evening. The TenZen calls and tells me she's going by car. Would I like to come along?
Unlike certain evil munches I know, The TenZen lives on this side of the universe, and hence, this was wonderful news.
In 20 minutes which included a lot of reprimandings about spur of the moment planning, and a lot of me scurrying about the place stuffing clothes into my bag (I would have to stay on that side of the universe for the night, due to it's being too far away from my side), I was sitting in the TenZen's car on my way to a Sudden Sleepover.
1. I drank alcohol. As soon as I got there. It was camouflaged in this bottle and flavoured with cranberry so I didnt know until I'd taken a sip and with a horrific grimace, read the label. 2% alcohol apparently. Breezers. Beb drank 7 bottles I think. Zz was the one who tricked me into it. (Angry look) Take advantage of my sudden arrival and the surrounding commotion, will you Zz? Wait, you just wait. :-P
Why the hell would anyone drink that? Yueechh. Bitter and icky it was. Yueechh.
2. Me Zz and Beb escaped to the calm serenity of the outside. Sat next to the lotus pond and chattered. (That sounds better than chatted) Threw stones at the window which opened out from the mini disco everyone else had started up. This however did not cause the disturbance we'd have liked.
3. Shared knowing looks with Osh at least 17 times.
4. Had an absolutely scrumptuous meal... macaroni and cheese, salad etc, and this lovely chocolate biscuit pudding. Snum's mum... Muah. :-)
5. They others left and the sleepover girls remained, like the flowers on a tabubiah tree do in spring. Hee hee.
Me Zz Osh and Snum, of course, we couldn't exclude her, it was her house after all.
6. We ate dinner. The rest took FOREVER to finish. Me Osh and Zz were sitting on the white couch in the secluded little corner watching them. Snum was being the perfect hostess as usual.
Actually, it was me and Zz at first, until Osh came over, admonished us for bing noisy, and then promptly joined in the noise.
Zz was reading Snum's prized possession: her newly bought Calvin and Hobbes book and discussing about whether we were Calvins' or Hobbes'. Apparently, I'm a Hobbes. Osh is a Calvin. I have no idea how they came to that conclusion.
When that topic had run dry, they began discussing about whether or not we could write books on one another.
Osh said she'd pay anyone who could come up with more than 3 pages on her a million dollars. Zz and I thought we'd try, but we were too lazy to get off the sofa.
Zz was "not talking to me" because I didnt know something about her that I've now again forgotten (if only you weren't so boring, Zz). You and merking, I swear.
7. It was 10.30pm. We hogged. Zz and Snum kept taking food off my plate. It tasted better off mine than off theirs appaently. Weird logic.
8. Snum's parents did the Forest Personality test and laughed a great deal at it/us, can't be sure which.
9. We went upstairs, it was 11.30pm. Changed (Snum looked like the Buddha for a short interval) and then proceeded to laugh ourselves silly over everything, Osh included.
10. At 1 am, we put on Just Like Heaven, a movie, on the comp. Reese Witherspoon and Mark(?) Buffalo(?). Very cute. Had to watch it till the end. It was 3.15am.
Decided we'd finally sleep. But ended up talking instead, calling Zz "Scheißen " at regular intervals and laughing hysterically.
11. It was 4am, they were hungry. Snum went to the dining room to get eats. Came back squealing hysterically that "There was something breathing in the dining room!" When we had rolled our eyes sufficiently enough, they ate. Later Snum started a whole whining session about crumbs on her bed. She later informed us that at around 6am, she had moved to another bedroom.
12.At 5.45 am I decided that now would be a good time to sleep. I rolled over and fell asleep.
3 seconds later, Snum woke me up. Except, it was 7.30am. Darn. Considered not going for the "very important class on our research papers". Decided we wouldnt and plonked back to bed. We were still laughing hysterically. Zz wasnt. She was under the covers mumbling death threats at us for having woken her up.
13. 8.05am Me and Osh are ready (Don't ask how we managed that fast, I have no idea) Zz's still not out of bed, Snum is compulsively ironing her pant. We leave. Take a while to find an auto. Get one.
14. The chilly wind hits my face as we sit there. I've forgotten my jacket in The TenZen's car. We reach coll with 10 min to spare.
HURRAY!
15. Grab a sandwich from the cafeteria and plonk in class.
16. Bedraggled Zz and Snum arrive later. Weirdly, we arent sleepy. At least I'm not. But after the holi crap class and its 1pm, I decide to go home and sleep. The thought of just 2 hours of sleep freaked me out. Missed only one class. Snum had low attendence and had to stay. Zz went to sleep. Osh carried on as usual, braving it through the day.
And thats how it ended
17. Osh's dialogue of the day "Our class is nothing but a bunch of assorted hooligans."
Zz's most repeated sentence "I'm not talking to you." We learnt not to take that one too seriously.
Snum's most funny noise (among a medley of others) "Shhhhh!" followed by "My grandma is sleeping!" This, we blatantly ignored.
All in all it was major fun. Memories. :-)
So she called 10 friends over for dinner. Her mother of course (poor dear) would have to cook.
Thing is, Snum lives on the other side of the universe. So I was pretty much resigned to the fact that I wouldn't be going. Until 7.30pm that evening. The TenZen calls and tells me she's going by car. Would I like to come along?
Unlike certain evil munches I know, The TenZen lives on this side of the universe, and hence, this was wonderful news.
In 20 minutes which included a lot of reprimandings about spur of the moment planning, and a lot of me scurrying about the place stuffing clothes into my bag (I would have to stay on that side of the universe for the night, due to it's being too far away from my side), I was sitting in the TenZen's car on my way to a Sudden Sleepover.
1. I drank alcohol. As soon as I got there. It was camouflaged in this bottle and flavoured with cranberry so I didnt know until I'd taken a sip and with a horrific grimace, read the label. 2% alcohol apparently. Breezers. Beb drank 7 bottles I think. Zz was the one who tricked me into it. (Angry look) Take advantage of my sudden arrival and the surrounding commotion, will you Zz? Wait, you just wait. :-P
Why the hell would anyone drink that? Yueechh. Bitter and icky it was. Yueechh.
2. Me Zz and Beb escaped to the calm serenity of the outside. Sat next to the lotus pond and chattered. (That sounds better than chatted) Threw stones at the window which opened out from the mini disco everyone else had started up. This however did not cause the disturbance we'd have liked.
3. Shared knowing looks with Osh at least 17 times.
4. Had an absolutely scrumptuous meal... macaroni and cheese, salad etc, and this lovely chocolate biscuit pudding. Snum's mum... Muah. :-)
5. They others left and the sleepover girls remained, like the flowers on a tabubiah tree do in spring. Hee hee.
Me Zz Osh and Snum, of course, we couldn't exclude her, it was her house after all.
6. We ate dinner. The rest took FOREVER to finish. Me Osh and Zz were sitting on the white couch in the secluded little corner watching them. Snum was being the perfect hostess as usual.
Actually, it was me and Zz at first, until Osh came over, admonished us for bing noisy, and then promptly joined in the noise.
Zz was reading Snum's prized possession: her newly bought Calvin and Hobbes book and discussing about whether we were Calvins' or Hobbes'. Apparently, I'm a Hobbes. Osh is a Calvin. I have no idea how they came to that conclusion.
When that topic had run dry, they began discussing about whether or not we could write books on one another.
Osh said she'd pay anyone who could come up with more than 3 pages on her a million dollars. Zz and I thought we'd try, but we were too lazy to get off the sofa.
Zz was "not talking to me" because I didnt know something about her that I've now again forgotten (if only you weren't so boring, Zz). You and merking, I swear.
7. It was 10.30pm. We hogged. Zz and Snum kept taking food off my plate. It tasted better off mine than off theirs appaently. Weird logic.
8. Snum's parents did the Forest Personality test and laughed a great deal at it/us, can't be sure which.
9. We went upstairs, it was 11.30pm. Changed (Snum looked like the Buddha for a short interval) and then proceeded to laugh ourselves silly over everything, Osh included.
10. At 1 am, we put on Just Like Heaven, a movie, on the comp. Reese Witherspoon and Mark(?) Buffalo(?). Very cute. Had to watch it till the end. It was 3.15am.
Decided we'd finally sleep. But ended up talking instead, calling Zz "Scheißen " at regular intervals and laughing hysterically.
11. It was 4am, they were hungry. Snum went to the dining room to get eats. Came back squealing hysterically that "There was something breathing in the dining room!" When we had rolled our eyes sufficiently enough, they ate. Later Snum started a whole whining session about crumbs on her bed. She later informed us that at around 6am, she had moved to another bedroom.
12.At 5.45 am I decided that now would be a good time to sleep. I rolled over and fell asleep.
3 seconds later, Snum woke me up. Except, it was 7.30am. Darn. Considered not going for the "very important class on our research papers". Decided we wouldnt and plonked back to bed. We were still laughing hysterically. Zz wasnt. She was under the covers mumbling death threats at us for having woken her up.
13. 8.05am Me and Osh are ready (Don't ask how we managed that fast, I have no idea) Zz's still not out of bed, Snum is compulsively ironing her pant. We leave. Take a while to find an auto. Get one.
14. The chilly wind hits my face as we sit there. I've forgotten my jacket in The TenZen's car. We reach coll with 10 min to spare.
HURRAY!
15. Grab a sandwich from the cafeteria and plonk in class.
16. Bedraggled Zz and Snum arrive later. Weirdly, we arent sleepy. At least I'm not. But after the holi crap class and its 1pm, I decide to go home and sleep. The thought of just 2 hours of sleep freaked me out. Missed only one class. Snum had low attendence and had to stay. Zz went to sleep. Osh carried on as usual, braving it through the day.
And thats how it ended
17. Osh's dialogue of the day "Our class is nothing but a bunch of assorted hooligans."
Zz's most repeated sentence "I'm not talking to you." We learnt not to take that one too seriously.
Snum's most funny noise (among a medley of others) "Shhhhh!" followed by "My grandma is sleeping!" This, we blatantly ignored.
All in all it was major fun. Memories. :-)
Saturday, January 6, 2007
A Zz and me bit: Gruesomeness
Guess what Zz messaged me about yesterday evening.
Go on, guess.
Raindrops on roses?
Whiskers on kittens?
Bright Copper kettles and warm woolen mittens?
Silver white winters that melt into springs?
No, No, No, No.
I think her exact words were:
If you die tom, would you like to be buried?
At first, I was shocked at her blatant indifference towards my passing.
"'If I died tomorrow...'?" I muttered to myself angrily. "'If I died tomorrow...'!? What is this? Some sort of joke? How dare she be so casual about me dying! Does she think MM's grow on trees or what? I'm sure my death merits more respect and importance than that! 'If you died tomorrow...' I show her dying. Just wait till I see her in college tomorrow. Phthbah!"
As much as I didnt want to think about the gruesome thought of my own death, I had to.
Because I was trying not to. :-|
I found out what I'd always known I suppose.
I would not like to be buried or cremated or by eaten by vultures.
But since cremation is what they do in our family, I guess i'd go for that. I don't really care actually. I mean, I'd be dead anyway.
And with that unpleasant thought, I turned my mind away from my own death, and focused instead, on Zz's answer.
Apparently, she'd like to be in an urn.
Yes, you read right, in an urn.
Specifically, in a beautiful urn.
Anyhou (which I've been saying a lot thanks to PS), the urn reminded me of a poem we had last semester that I rather liked:
Though I dont particularly agree on the the last two lines, I do like the poem.
Heard melodies are sweet, but those unheard
Are sweeter; therefore, ye soft pipes, play on;
Ah, happy, happy boughs! that cannot shed
Your leaves, nor ever bid the Spring adieu;
And, happy melodist, unweari-ed,
Forever piping songs forever new;
Bold Lover, never, never canst thou kiss,
Though winning near the goal---yet, do not grieve;
She cannot fade, though thou hast not thy bliss
Forever wilt thou love, and she be fair!
Those are my favourite lines. Poor guy. he was depressed when he wrote this. Felt it'd be better to be on the urn instead. Well, at least he wasnt thinking of being in it, like Zz.
The reason why this poor gentleman was depressed, is because his wife'd left him. Poor chap. Failed marriage. Her name ws Anne I think. She ran off with someone. I distinctly remember my teacher saying that.
I could of course, be completely mistaken. This could be information on one of the other 5 billion poets whose work we had to study last sem.
I could be utterly wrong and have told you the life history of George Herbert or John Dryden or someone.
But I'm pretty sure that it was a failed marriage that Keats had.
Go on, guess.
Raindrops on roses?
Whiskers on kittens?
Bright Copper kettles and warm woolen mittens?
Silver white winters that melt into springs?
No, No, No, No.
I think her exact words were:
If you die tom, would you like to be buried?
At first, I was shocked at her blatant indifference towards my passing.
"'If I died tomorrow...'?" I muttered to myself angrily. "'If I died tomorrow...'!? What is this? Some sort of joke? How dare she be so casual about me dying! Does she think MM's grow on trees or what? I'm sure my death merits more respect and importance than that! 'If you died tomorrow...' I show her dying. Just wait till I see her in college tomorrow. Phthbah!"
As much as I didnt want to think about the gruesome thought of my own death, I had to.
Because I was trying not to. :-|
I found out what I'd always known I suppose.
I would not like to be buried or cremated or by eaten by vultures.
But since cremation is what they do in our family, I guess i'd go for that. I don't really care actually. I mean, I'd be dead anyway.
And with that unpleasant thought, I turned my mind away from my own death, and focused instead, on Zz's answer.
Apparently, she'd like to be in an urn.
Yes, you read right, in an urn.
Specifically, in a beautiful urn.
Anyhou (which I've been saying a lot thanks to PS), the urn reminded me of a poem we had last semester that I rather liked:
ODE ON A GRECIAN URN
By John Keats
Thou still unravished bride of quietness,
Thou foster child of silence and slow time,
Sylvan historian, who canst thus express
A flowery tale more sweetly than our rhyme:
What leaf-fringed legend haunts about thy shape
Of deities or mortals, or of both,
In Tempe or the dales of Arcady?
What men or gods are these? What maidens loath?
What mad pursuit? What struggle to escape?
What pipes and timbrels? What wild ecstasy?
Heard melodies are sweet, but those unheard
Are sweeter; therefore, ye soft pipes, play on;
Not to the sensual ear, but, more endeared,
Pipe to the spirit dities of no tone.
Fair youth, beneath the trees, thou canst not leave
Thy song, nor ever can those trees be bare;
Bold Lover, never, never canst thou kiss,
Though winning near the goal---yet, do not grieve;
She cannot fade, though thou hast not thy bliss
Forever wilt thou love, and she be fair!
Ah, happy, happy boughs! that cannot shed
Your leaves, nor ever bid the Spring adieu;
And, happy melodist, unweari-ed,
Forever piping songs forever new;
More happy love! more happy, happy love!
Forever warm and still to be enjoyed,
Forever panting, and forever young;
All breathing human passion far above,
That leaves a heart high-sorrowful and cloyed,
A burning forehead, and a parching tongue.
Who are these coming to the sacrifice?
To what green altar, O mysterious priest,
Lead'st thou that heifer lowing at the skies,
And all her silken flanks with garlands dressed?
What little town by river or sea shore,
Or mountain-built with peaceful citadel,
Is emptied of this folk, this pious morn?
And, little town, thy streets for evermore
Will silent be; and not a soul to tell
Why thou art desolate, can e'er return.
O Attic shape! Fair attitude! with brede
Of marble men and maidens overwrought,
With forest branches and the trodden weed;
Thou, silent form, dost tease us out of thought
As doth eternity. Cold Pastoral!
When old age shall this generation waste,
Thou shalt remain, in midst of other woe
Than ours, a friend to man, to whom thou say'st,
"Beauty is truth, truth beauty"---that is all
Ye know on earth, and all ye need to know.
1820
Though I dont particularly agree on the the last two lines, I do like the poem.
Heard melodies are sweet, but those unheard
Are sweeter; therefore, ye soft pipes, play on;
Ah, happy, happy boughs! that cannot shed
Your leaves, nor ever bid the Spring adieu;
And, happy melodist, unweari-ed,
Forever piping songs forever new;
Bold Lover, never, never canst thou kiss,
Though winning near the goal---yet, do not grieve;
She cannot fade, though thou hast not thy bliss
Forever wilt thou love, and she be fair!
Those are my favourite lines. Poor guy. he was depressed when he wrote this. Felt it'd be better to be on the urn instead. Well, at least he wasnt thinking of being in it, like Zz.
The reason why this poor gentleman was depressed, is because his wife'd left him. Poor chap. Failed marriage. Her name ws Anne I think. She ran off with someone. I distinctly remember my teacher saying that.
I could of course, be completely mistaken. This could be information on one of the other 5 billion poets whose work we had to study last sem.
I could be utterly wrong and have told you the life history of George Herbert or John Dryden or someone.
But I'm pretty sure that it was a failed marriage that Keats had.
Friday, January 5, 2007
The Unicorn Thing Again
Would you believe it?
My 4 and a half year old niece in Dubai, I learn, when I get there, ALSO has her very own unicorn.
And GET THIS! Its white with a purple mane and tail.
Deja vu.
History really does repeat itself. Goodness.
This particular unicorn is named Pegasus, except, when she pronounces it, she says Pe-KAW-sus and stares at you wide eyed while saying it.
One afternoon in the sunlit hall, I managed to convince her that Pekawsus had once belonged to me, that I had sent him to her, and that he had flown accross the seven seas to reach her, with those flimsy little wings of his. (Kids today are so gulible... rolls eyes)
Pekawsus, understandably, made no comment.
Soon, however, that became a favourite bedtime story. How I had bought him, about how I grew up, and then she had been born, and how I had said that he'd better go to Dubai to meet her, and about his journey accross the seven seas.
This was accompanied by Pekawsus performing short re enactmants of his perilous flight. This was naturally, the highlight of the whole event.
A fine specimen that Pekawsus is. Very cutely adorable, with a handsome glittering horn and a healthy glowing coat. He even comes in his very own special pink furry basket.
:-D ha ha
laughs some more
Oh... the saga continues... and continues...
_________________________________
My 4 and a half year old niece in Dubai, I learn, when I get there, ALSO has her very own unicorn.
And GET THIS! Its white with a purple mane and tail.
Deja vu.
History really does repeat itself. Goodness.
This particular unicorn is named Pegasus, except, when she pronounces it, she says Pe-KAW-sus and stares at you wide eyed while saying it.
One afternoon in the sunlit hall, I managed to convince her that Pekawsus had once belonged to me, that I had sent him to her, and that he had flown accross the seven seas to reach her, with those flimsy little wings of his. (Kids today are so gulible... rolls eyes)
Pekawsus, understandably, made no comment.
Soon, however, that became a favourite bedtime story. How I had bought him, about how I grew up, and then she had been born, and how I had said that he'd better go to Dubai to meet her, and about his journey accross the seven seas.
This was accompanied by Pekawsus performing short re enactmants of his perilous flight. This was naturally, the highlight of the whole event.
A fine specimen that Pekawsus is. Very cutely adorable, with a handsome glittering horn and a healthy glowing coat. He even comes in his very own special pink furry basket.
:-D ha ha
laughs some more
Oh... the saga continues... and continues...
_________________________________
Friday, December 22, 2006
A Zz and me bit: Mythological Characters
Was every little girl obsessed with unicorns?
So its a Thursday.
Not a very nice day, to be sitting in front of the TV, especially after a very entertaining Wednesday... sigh! :-) Ed, more Ed and Grey's Anatomy.
But what can you do?
No worries, Zz is here.
The phone screen lights up.(Always pleased, it is, to see her)
This time, the message is:
What was your favourite mythological creature as a kid?
I ponder over this deeply (as I have nothing even remotely better to do), and am transported back.
When I was a kid, I had this book-cum-tape cassette series that my dad bought me at the Sunday market.
Sigh. What joy those books have brought.
You would have to play the tape, and follow what the narrators were saying in the book, and look at the pictures and enjoy. :-) For a 5 year old me, this was a LOT of fun, and I spent many a joyful hour over them.
There was one particular book... well they were more like magazines actually, with stories in them... Book number 14, if I remember right, all light blue and nice looking... and there was one particular story in it about a Minatour.
You know, those monsters, with the head of a bull and the body of a man.
The story was about one brave prince of Athens or something. He'd to save his people from some evil tyrant of some sort. The tyrant owned a minatour, and he required 7 men and 7 women to be fed to it each month. The people he used were the prince's and so the prince decided to stop it all. (not very eloquently described, I know, but bear with me).
The tyrant agreed to stop this cruel sacrifice if the prince could go into the minatours maze, and come out alive. Incidently, the prince is also in love with the tyrant's daughter, but this is inconsequential. Oh, wait, it isn't. She helps him by telling him how to get through the maze I think.
Anyway, the prince gets through the maze and reaches the minatour.
This was the part that really got to me.
The music, the suspense, the sound of the battle, the roar of the minatour, the one picture in that book...
all had a very lasting impression on my imagination, and etched itself very strongly in my memory.
So brilliantly done was that tape. Its an art in itself. The narration. The music. The sound effects. The illustrations. All brought together perfectly. A job well done.
I wonder why such things arent marketted a whole lot.
Actually, no I dont. Stupid nintendo...playstation...mutter....grumble.
The phone lights up again.
Zz: What are you? Dead?
And thats when I remembered the pony. Aah, the pony. I'm laughing in fond rememberance now...
There was this cartoon series on TV called My Little Pony. (Yes, I know you're laughing too)
Each pony had a different symbol on its back, and thus had different super powers.
I had my HEART set on one of this pony figurines that they were selling. The white one. I didnt want any other colour. Not orange, not purple, not blue. I wanted the white one. Because the white one, was a UNICORN.
Yes. It had a lovely silver horn in the middle of its pretty white forehead. After I'd drooled and begged and pleaded, (which I didnt do very often), my parents sighed and gave in.
The pony was in my possession. Oh what fun I had with it. Combing its purple mane and tail and all that. (laughs again)
So my favourite mythological creature was definitely a unicorn. Most definitely.
I type that in to Zz, and so sooner as it been sent, I get a message from her.
Zz: I'm tired of waiting. I bet you're thinking. You are, arent you? Freak. Mine was a unicorn.
_______________________________________________________________________
So its a Thursday.
Not a very nice day, to be sitting in front of the TV, especially after a very entertaining Wednesday... sigh! :-) Ed, more Ed and Grey's Anatomy.
But what can you do?
No worries, Zz is here.
The phone screen lights up.(Always pleased, it is, to see her)
This time, the message is:
What was your favourite mythological creature as a kid?
I ponder over this deeply (as I have nothing even remotely better to do), and am transported back.
When I was a kid, I had this book-cum-tape cassette series that my dad bought me at the Sunday market.
Sigh. What joy those books have brought.
You would have to play the tape, and follow what the narrators were saying in the book, and look at the pictures and enjoy. :-) For a 5 year old me, this was a LOT of fun, and I spent many a joyful hour over them.
There was one particular book... well they were more like magazines actually, with stories in them... Book number 14, if I remember right, all light blue and nice looking... and there was one particular story in it about a Minatour.
You know, those monsters, with the head of a bull and the body of a man.
The story was about one brave prince of Athens or something. He'd to save his people from some evil tyrant of some sort. The tyrant owned a minatour, and he required 7 men and 7 women to be fed to it each month. The people he used were the prince's and so the prince decided to stop it all. (not very eloquently described, I know, but bear with me).
The tyrant agreed to stop this cruel sacrifice if the prince could go into the minatours maze, and come out alive. Incidently, the prince is also in love with the tyrant's daughter, but this is inconsequential. Oh, wait, it isn't. She helps him by telling him how to get through the maze I think.
Anyway, the prince gets through the maze and reaches the minatour.
This was the part that really got to me.
The music, the suspense, the sound of the battle, the roar of the minatour, the one picture in that book...
all had a very lasting impression on my imagination, and etched itself very strongly in my memory.
So brilliantly done was that tape. Its an art in itself. The narration. The music. The sound effects. The illustrations. All brought together perfectly. A job well done.
I wonder why such things arent marketted a whole lot.
Actually, no I dont. Stupid nintendo...playstation...mutter....grumble.
The phone lights up again.
Zz: What are you? Dead?
And thats when I remembered the pony. Aah, the pony. I'm laughing in fond rememberance now...
There was this cartoon series on TV called My Little Pony. (Yes, I know you're laughing too)
Each pony had a different symbol on its back, and thus had different super powers.
I had my HEART set on one of this pony figurines that they were selling. The white one. I didnt want any other colour. Not orange, not purple, not blue. I wanted the white one. Because the white one, was a UNICORN.
Yes. It had a lovely silver horn in the middle of its pretty white forehead. After I'd drooled and begged and pleaded, (which I didnt do very often), my parents sighed and gave in.
The pony was in my possession. Oh what fun I had with it. Combing its purple mane and tail and all that. (laughs again)
So my favourite mythological creature was definitely a unicorn. Most definitely.
I type that in to Zz, and so sooner as it been sent, I get a message from her.
Zz: I'm tired of waiting. I bet you're thinking. You are, arent you? Freak. Mine was a unicorn.
_______________________________________________________________________
ECNR
If you are going to get your ECNR (Emigration Check Not Required) at the passport office, please take with you the following:
1. A pillow (or a movable bed if possible, so you can catch up on sleep while waiting in that abnormally long queue.)
2. 5 books you've been meaning to read for the past couple of years. You'll be able to finish them by the time you're out. That'll be an achievement, won't it?
3. A camera. So you can catch on film, the many embarassing things that various people will do throughout your stint on that god forsaken patch of city.
4. An umbrella. In case it rains while you're in the second half of the queue, which extends far outside the compound of the building, is unsheltered and is highly uncomfortable.
5. A fierce expression and demenour. This will help. You'll know how when you get there.
6. A bib. For when frustrated mothers thrust their two year old kids, (who, incidently, also require ECNRs for their travel) on you, whilst trying to feed them extremely messing looking food that they have brought in smelly little boxes.
7. A note pad. You'll want to write down all you see. Record the trauma and all that.
8. A cell phone. In case you are so utterly bored that you want to kill yourself, in which case you will need a friend (or a social worker) to talk you out of it.
9. A large large dose of patience. It won't be enough, but you'd still better take it along.
10. Your original 12th standard marks card. I had to go back for it.
Phew. Thank God that ordeal is over.
__________________________________________________________________________
1. A pillow (or a movable bed if possible, so you can catch up on sleep while waiting in that abnormally long queue.)
2. 5 books you've been meaning to read for the past couple of years. You'll be able to finish them by the time you're out. That'll be an achievement, won't it?
3. A camera. So you can catch on film, the many embarassing things that various people will do throughout your stint on that god forsaken patch of city.
4. An umbrella. In case it rains while you're in the second half of the queue, which extends far outside the compound of the building, is unsheltered and is highly uncomfortable.
5. A fierce expression and demenour. This will help. You'll know how when you get there.
6. A bib. For when frustrated mothers thrust their two year old kids, (who, incidently, also require ECNRs for their travel) on you, whilst trying to feed them extremely messing looking food that they have brought in smelly little boxes.
7. A note pad. You'll want to write down all you see. Record the trauma and all that.
8. A cell phone. In case you are so utterly bored that you want to kill yourself, in which case you will need a friend (or a social worker) to talk you out of it.
9. A large large dose of patience. It won't be enough, but you'd still better take it along.
10. Your original 12th standard marks card. I had to go back for it.
Phew. Thank God that ordeal is over.
__________________________________________________________________________
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