Showing posts with label Jaytalking. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Jaytalking. Show all posts

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

A Happy Birthday Jay! Post

As is customary, and quite a tradition now on this blog, we must wish Jay a Happy Birthday Day here.

Happy Birthday Day, Jay!

I'd love to write more, but the day isn't looking too spectacular. There's a four o' clock deadline, followed by a meeting at the Head branch of TheBankILove in Bandra Kurla Complex (they're one of our loveliest clients).

So other than the fact that my boss gave me an idli for breakfast, and that Pushpa the maid called me "Heroine", my day pretty much sucks. Oh, not to forget the shopping spree that Divya Sooch and I are off to today evening. Yayyy. (Okay, so it's not that bad.)

But Jay, Im sure you're having a much better day. As you should. I could gush about our friendship for pages and pages but what's the point, no? I have gushed earlier.
The dossier, hearing ourselves speak, deer stories & cult torture, and the laughter.
You know I lowe you! XOXO. Gossip Girl.


I found these while hunting for birthday profile pic. :P

Thursday, April 23, 2009

A pwomiss is a pwomiss

And now is when I blurt out nonsense! Wait for it!! Wait for it!
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Why does that Vodaphone lady greet you with malicious laughter when she's about to tell you that the number you are trying to call is unavailable? "Hahaha the Vodaphone number you are trying to reach is currently unavailable hahaha." I mean why is that necessary, that smug smile in her voice? Cut it out I say! Throw that lady in front of a bus I say! Do they WANT us to associate Vodaphone with murderous feelings already? Really.
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Fantastic ad I saw. Poster. Large. In medical store. I stared at it the entire twenty five minutes I was waiting for the fat lady to decipher the prescription and waddle around uncertainly trying to pick the right drugs off the shelf.

"Vicks" it says proudly. "Trusted by 70% doctors."

All I could think of the entire time was about the 30% who considered it a health hazard.
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I dearly wanted to put up the collage Oshmunch made of me and her... and then converted into a darling magnet that sits prettily above my mirror, but having recently heard internet psycho story, I have decided against. :(
It is so cute though. Just so you know.
Oshmunch is in Delhi doing a PR internship. She is missed much.
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Also, Im 21. It's true. Each year I must will myself to believe that I am in fact aging, by telling myself here on my blog. I am 21. It's true.
It happened some 6 days ago, while I was in Singapore.
I lay awake the night before curled up in the foetal position (as is tradition before birthdays) evaluating my life up till date and feeling that I really really really hadnt done enough with all of it. :( Wonderful way to bring in a new year. But in the morning I woke up all reassured, I must've had some sort of calming dream or something.
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And then I got back and Jay had been such a deer and arranged something in my absence for my 21st. We all met up and had such a glorious evening of fun... I wish it could have gone on forever. And Im not usually so senty about things like that. This was truly an awesome evening, I couldnt have had more fun. Everyone was adorable and the gifts are all treasured. :)
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And now we're on yesterday's party page of the Deccan Chronicle. Did I ever think the day would come? No. Has it though? Yes.

I suppose our little non achievements must be given their due credit. Besides, while I was appalled at first, after I saw it I wasn't as much. Same with the others. It was actually a really cute little write up. And it kind of serves the purpose of a permanent reminder of such a wonderful evening. :)
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Goose I miss the days. I am going to make a photo album especially of the days. Who would have thought they would be times that we missed. Let this photo be a tribute to the-week-I-want-to-go-back-to. You write your GRE soon I say goose. Oh, and I have a photo gift for you from Singapore. Later. For now I leave you with this reminder (that will make no sense to anyone but me and you. :D) Giggles.
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The internship started yesterday, with Orchard India, ad agency. (Isnt the website like, sew cool?) I have also been sorting my life out a wee bit. Sigh. More on that later.
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I have a cold. After a long time. It kinda sucks sneezing so often.
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I have just realised that NO topic is too trivial for this blog.

So I shall now proceed to talk extensively about the Leaping Ant.
I've encountered a fair share of crazy animals in my life, the mad squirrel, the Dog of My Life and lagoose to name a few, but none of them were quite as mad as the leaping ant.

So the other night I'm sitting on my bed (upright for once), back to the wall, studying for a very important exam (so I'd like you to believe, but I am in fact simply staring vacantly into space, one earphone in place, and a book open before me, waiting for the cows to come home).

I lean my head against the wall in sheer desperation, when I see out of the corner of my eye, a very large black ant. I do not have a heart attack, and pat myself on the back in commendation of my bravery. Meanwhile the ant leaps a good 3 feet in my direction. I have a heart attack and scramble in an ungainly manner off the bed. Whereupon it leaps after me. So high! SO far! It was truly a sight to behold. After it had chased me a couple of times around the room I mustered the courage and found an opportune moment to flick it out of the stairwell window.
But it was quite a display of acrobatics. I never imagined such a thing possible.

I must save this unsavoury moment for posterity! I thought to myself. And so I have.
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And with that, I leave you. Until my next dose of nonsense.
Peace.
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Friday, January 23, 2009

Slumdog Millionaire, Auto Raja Post and Psych Fest

Little obsession is happening with Slumdog Millionaire. Ever since I watched it. (I most certainly didnt watch it at Bestest's two weeks ago because GreatSenseofDirection Dude had it on his removable hard drive. That would be illegal.)

I reallyreallyreallyreally loved the movie. And Dev Patel. *Sigh* It's all in the eyebrows.
Dev? Are you listening? I know you're 17 and all. But still. Call me.

There were some trivial things that irked me: Like how Anil Kapoor pronounces millionaire. "Who wants to be... a millin-air!!!!" I dunno, that was just JARRing. Yuck. It's mil IAN air.

Also, the slum dwellers English accents when they grew older. Huh? They sounded more like middle upper educated class Indian English accents. Although not accurate, I actually kinda liked it. I guess I related to the characters more because of it.

NOTHING ELSE! The music is JUST awesome. JUST. Paper Planes is my current favourite. And those little kids! Amazing jobs they've done. Perfect, in fact.

Twice this week I have watched half an hour debates on Times Now(blah) on whether "We as a nation are still touchy about poverty." And "Does Slumdog Millionnaire portray us badly to the rest of the world." Which is silly actually because nobody is supposed to have watched it yet. And also, do we HAVE nothing else to talk about?

Of course we're touchy about poverty. But look, it's a movie. You cant be too much PR types in your movie. What image will this person get about this and how will that affect everything else. If you did that, you'd never be able to make something you truly felt about. Movies are art, your voice. You cant bend them around to suit PR strategies for the country for chrissake. Too much talk for no reason.
I only wish Frieda Pinto (who's gorgeous by the way) had been a little smarter in the way she answered some of those question they were asking her. She kept ON saying in all her interviews that THIS was the real Mumbai. THIS was a true depiction of Mumbai. Hello. It was one PART of Mumbai, there are so many aspects of the city that werent portrayed. I mean there is culture, and good schools and goodness as well, you know? She could have easily said "Yes, this IS what Mumbai is like. This is an accuarate portrayal of what part of Mumbai is like."

Look at them. Already at the Golden Globes. Oscars. Even I want to do great things with my life. *pouts*
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Yay 1000 bucks this time InBloom Creative writing first place. Yay! You should have seen my face while signing for cheque. Teacher was highly amused. I thought they'll give 500 or something. These Christ people no. This is the only time of the year that I like them so much. Jay and I have made a plan that if we dont get high paying jobs, we'll just hit all the college fests and submit prize winning entries for everything. Full rich.
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Doesnt it annoy you when these auto drivers (I see you sit up in your seat and start nodding) almost bash into someone ok, and then start driving almost immediately, but while staring at the person they've almost hit, threateningly?
I mean stop the gaadi and then stare no? Stare all you want. Throw daggers with your eyes. Remain there, without saying anything, glaring evilly for as long as you want. But dont keep the gaadi moving, and stare while continuing to drive into other people and things. Smart too much. Right into that oncoming bus.
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Pah. It's too tough being a celeb and all. What a sad thing to happen to anyone.
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Psych fest no. Sigh what memories. There's a pattern we FEPs follow for the 12 Minutes to fame event, you know.

I FEP- You're new you dont know what the hell this psych fest is all about. You dont do anything and hurriedly put on a 12 minutes to fame piece of nothingness.
II FEP- fueled by last year's embarrassment, you decide to put on a really good show. And your previously disintegrated class comes together and you feel great euphoria and its just awesomeness.
III FEP- You have a lot on your mind. There's lots of other stuff going on. Half your class doesnt turn up because this is all old shit ya. You're lazy. You make something up on the morning of the show and almost get third place but miss by one mark.

How history repeats itself. Sigh.
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Sunday, January 4, 2009

Christmas hols

I've learnt to be more content these Christmas hols. The restlessness, the wanderlust, the nothing ever being enough has gone. Out the door. With my misery. It really has. Jay was quoting for me the other day:

jacob: "we live life in the 'theres'. We are disappointed because once we reach the 'there' we just make another 'there' for ourselves and slog towards that. Savour life, look for the 'here'. Once you learn to appreciate and live the 'here', the 'there' becomes easier and more savorable"
And that's really how I was living a lot of this year. I mean, in the 'there'. But these hols had virtually NO plans, I was just going to relax and laze and do nothing and live in the moment and not worry about filling every second of it (which is a really big step for me, I usually have to be working and occupied and busy ALL the time or I feel worthless or like I'm wasting my youth or something :/) and somehow everything got filled anyway, even though I wasn't worrying my head about making it so. And it was relaxed filled, not jampacked filled, do I make sense? And I enjoyed everything so much better because I wasnt thinking so much about the whole thing.
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We went to Hampi for one thing, on last minute plans. Tbaby gave hath (ooo look, the MMGirl, she speaks Hindi!) so it was me Osh and Overseas Friend (I must find her another name) who went. And it was goshdarn nice I tell you. You know that happy content feeling in the pit of your stomach? It was that, throughout. I think I shall dedicate another post to that, sometime soon. (Yes, soon. :P)
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Then there was the spending of time with the niece and nephews. Have I mentioned how much I love them? It overflows this love, I just want to squeeze them all hard when they're around (I refrain from it of course.) Actually there is just a whole lotta affection thing happening this month, the overflowing, and Ive been taking it all out on Osh, Shar and Jay. Jay, he doesnt mind so much. But the other two have complained. Funny, I got affection expressed and wanted as low in FIRO B.
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Then there was the eating out. Shu, Im such a foodie. Then there was the Nigella recipes and trying them out. (I googled the web yesterday for yoga exercises for my tummy, not to worry) Casa del sol- not so good. Toscana- nice desserts!. Rajdhani- Shru, you shouldnt have paid! >:| McD- Well. Raghus- Dude this is the best place ever. Timeless.
For better reviews, see this blog, Gastronomical G-Spot , which I found extremely useful.

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Then there was the outright crazy new year. Let's just say that flaming santro cars that you can see from 300 metres away, shattered windshields, 100 rupee food coupons, and 4000 people you dont know is NOT my idea of the best way to usher in the new year. Followed by and following 3 hour drives. :| Oshmunch, my only solace. Muah! :)
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I also frequented BMS college of engineering. (Well, not frequented. :)) And toured Bestest's temple of learning, with Cow (I feel bad calling him that, I do because Bestest does. And it is a term of affection, and so appropriate), V, Rash and Puppy. And took weird story photos. And laughed and got embarrassed in front of amoebae, I'd forgotten how Bestest does that. ____________________________________________________________________

Then the Couch with GS, the giggling, the opening of hearts, the walking up and down MG road buying ghastly earrings because "They're just 25 rupees!". More giggling. Actually watching a Hindi movie with her. HER and ME! Can you believe it? Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi. Ack. Well, it wasnt too bad. She's pretty, and great for a beginner. And he's well, him. The sumo wrestling scene made me want to jump out of my seat and run out of the audi. And the drama scenes on the night where the lights spells 'I love you' was toooo much, I had to hold my head and rock back and forth in my seat to escape from the pain of it all. But otherwise quite swallowable. Quite. Then we went and sat in Garuda mall Barrista, had a look at the menus and ran out, giggling like we'd do in PUC. Hahaha, I cant tell you how much I enjoyed that. All this being 20 and all, you become too proper in public places, I dont laik it. This was fun.
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I think on top of the list of most fulfilling was being with Shru and FnA at UB City. And spending that day with springystepped earlier as well. 6 straight hours of continous talking and catching up. Sitting at Coffee Day Square (go there, its lovely, but prices are triple usual coffee day. :|) until the waiters got fed up and tried to kick us out. Still having way too much to talk about. All that shall be remedied this week. :)
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Finally getting the hang of downloading. Whooppeee!! It feels grrrrrreat!! Little Women. I can just watch that movie over and over. The only thing I dont like about it is Beth! How could they cast her? She looks like she is possessed the entire time! And that's really NOT what Beth is like. Tchah. Laurie is *SIGH*! :) Love that movie.
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The sleepovers with Shru and FnA. And making Nigella type cheesecake for mum and dad.
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There's something about Christmas that gives me a good feeling in my tummy. :)
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A Whole Lotta Nothing, a Happy New Year, and a Very Happy Birthday La! Post

Here la! I dedicate my most boring post ever to you! Because I love you that much! :P
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Little tension is happening. Why means? 59 days until college gets over. I counted. (Yes I do crazed things like this when Im panicked.) So yes. And I have no clue what Im doing after. Or rather I have too many clues and tis difficult to choose from them. This is my final year, and there's no fixed plan, and in 59 days Im out of college, with no idea of what's ahead. Woot. Im so happy.
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Today is La's birthday. So this is all dedicated to her, my Bestest, who so often annoys me for new posts. La is far off in Madikeri, but I am with her in thoughts. I forced myself out of a very heavy blog slumber for you my goose. God knows what pleasure you derive from reading my mangled thoughts, but Im glad that you do. :)
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One of aforementioned thoughts is, how can people use yahoo mail when there is gmail? I mean HOW? Gmail is so convenient. There are so many useful little feature thingammys that make life so EASY.
Labeling, that lovely clear layout, archiving,
most importantly conversation emails, where all your replies are in one email,
gtalk right there, To do list right there,
and lately those theme things- I have Zooblimps, they is darn kyoot. :)

And how CAN people still use Hi5 (Jay sent me a friend request from there, I couldnt believe people were still active on that mess) when there's Facebook that's so much more private and convenient? (Let us not get into debating the issue of social networking sites, boon or bane? just now.)

HOW I ask you, HOW!?!! Life's mysteries, for sooth.
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The word convenient. I pronounce it differently in my head, after I recently discovered it was spelled conVENient, and not conVINient, as I'd earlier believed, and that my motorola dictionary was not stupid as I'd earlier assumed.
Convenient. Fascinating word that, and a favourite.
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Motorola sucks dude. No wonder these shooting pains down my arm have gotten so frequent (hmmm, what's that? Why yes, it IS my left arm. A heart attack you say?) I have the w375 (Yes, snazziest model ever. But it's a flip, and so I like.) and its frickin impossible to type anything on it. Nokia over Motorola any day.
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I made up a new word. It's an insult: Ridiculouse. It is used to describe someone who is both ridiculous and a louse.
Usage: That Samir is such a ridiculouse. Not only does he have no respect for women, but he also comes to college wearing clown's clothes.

Now if that's not a useful word, I dont know what is.
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It's funny how I dont swear here.
I do in real life.
*pauses*
Yes, this blog is an illusion.
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I know it's like totally unfashionable to say this, but Im still crazy about Friends. Even my dad has graduated from saying "Ay, what is this I say? Bunch of lunatics! Switch the bloody tv off!" to guffawing loudly and calling me downstairs to watch it with him every evening at seven. Its a nice little ritual we have now.
I find I am very much like Monica.
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Im very obsessed with recording things. I feel very unsettled when I havent documented something that's happened to me. Im so afraid of forgetting. And FnA's extremely pathetic memory scares me all the more. I dont want to look back and think what did I do with all that time. I have to know that I used it all properly. Im so afraid of forgetting.
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I dont put my heart out here much, do I? Most blogs read do. Not their own hearts of course, but their publisher's.

I do not wail about lost and unreturned loves here because, erm, that is just really not me.
I do not complain about feeling like shit. Much.
I do not lament about how things are not going my way.

I guess it's because Im not much the drama queen types. And Im generally a happy person. And while that does not mean Im singing soprano to little yellow canary birds perched on my fingers all day, it does mean that Im generally content.
But that also means that when Im sad, it really hits me. And I do not post about it here, because, well I just dont.
There are things I worry about. Usually I feel on top of the world, and like I can do anything, like my life will be just the way I want it to be, like I can conquer anything. And there are times I feel like nothing is going my way and I dont post about it because, well because.

I havent been too confessional diary-type personal this past year. And those are really the best blogs to read. Perhaps I shall be in the coming year.
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An Oshsay I wanted to document. What is it? Oshsay number 10? Ah yes. Number 9. Saved in a draft. Here:

Oshsays IX- February 08

1. Osh: My toe thumb is paining.
2. Osh: What? If you can have a toenail, you can have a toethumb.
3. Snumsay: What'd she call it? Big toe finger?
4: Osh: They're all toe fingers.
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Another draft: Conversation in an auto. (Some non-intelligence saved for posterity)

Tam, me, Shar and Osh on Shar's lap.

Destination: Hellhole
Time: Vairy late for psych seminar in Main Audi.

Shar: Osh. Totally creasing my kurta. Totally.
Osh: Deal with it.

Shar: With Osh on my lap and creasing my kurta, there is hardly any room for my bag. No space for my bag here AT all. Keep it behind munch? Let's not forget it ok? Remember.

*quiet for two minutes.
Shar gazes outside.
We hear humming from that corner of the auto.
She stares randomly at a couple of motorists.
She complains bitterly about a couple of motorists staring at her.*

Five minutes later.

Shar: SHIT, did I bring a bag?

Tam: *gasp*haha uhyuahyuahu haha*gasp*

We got there and you shoulda SEEN what a wretch IndustrialFellow was being. Did not let us in. And when we finally sneaked in (Poor Jay was elsewhere and left out), AbnormalLady accosted us. "Giwe me yuur roll numburs." Silence.
"Giwe.
Me.
Yuur.
Roll.
Num-
BERS."

Whereupon I gave breaknumber and worried for ages that she'd catch me.

And that is a day in the life of MM.
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Back to Lagoose and her birthday gift. (Dont throw a fit, this isnt ALL you will be getting)
My goose, here is a collage of all the ugliest pictures we have ever taken, for you.
On your 21st (Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!) birthday.
Enjoy! And I lurve you much!

I dont know what that brown square in the bottom right corner is all about. It wasnt there when I made the collage. We shall think of it as "The future", yes? :)

Ok collage not uploading. I shall try later. Know it is there, that's enough. :)
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Monday, December 8, 2008

THERE IS NO POST FOR NOVEMBER

NOOOOOOOOO!! How could this be happening!!


*calms down*

Yes so I've been little busy. And loads of updating is needed, but I have GRE coming up. Herhetjrhsba. (No, that is not a GRE word, thats just me choking.) So Im afraid this place is going to be dead a little longer.

I will however republish a few posts I'd written a long time ago on my old blog, here, under the dates I wrote them, purely for your reading entertainment! *acknowledges the cheering*

They're all Bits about Zz, here are the links.
Nose Cardys and Monsters
Gruesomeness
The Zz Code

And I will take this opportunity also to wish Jay a happy birday day, thus bringing the number of mediums I have wished him in to five hundred and eighty four. Happy Birday day Jay! See his blog.

And I will see you all in Jan. Or December end. Or before that if it catches my fancy.

Yours panickingly, (GRE word?)

A Jittery MM.
Yo.

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

The Exams are Ovah! :D

(Well, there's one more left, but it doesnt count. Last exams never count. )

So the exams have ended and now I can look back at them fondly and reminisce over the many inconsequential incidents that occurred during.

Like the time when I got Bestest to be my subject for the Abnormal psychology practical exam.

MM: Laa, be my subject noooooo?
La: *groans* But what'll I have to do and all?
MM: Nothing, I'll just be checking whether you have psychotic tendencies. Whether you might just strangle an unsuspecting passer by on the road. You know. That stuff. Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease??
La: I know I want to strangle you right now.

So she came and all. But I was ten minutes late for the exam and I hadnt studied. (What ok? I was with V and Meril and all of them and watching Cow's movie and I didnt want to leeeave. Would you? Tell me honestly)
So I was there a bit late and I was standing outside the parking lot mugging things out loud.

MM: La, listen to me, I'll just tell them out to you: Democratic values, Economic, Social, Aesthetic, Knowledge, Power, Hedonistic... gosh darn why are there so many of them... Family Prestige, Religious, Health values... there thats all of them, ok? Ok? Done. Good thats over. Next...
La: *rolls eyes, puts on pained smile, tries to stop self from puling hair out of head*

So I got to the main block and upstairs and I glimpse a few of my classmates in the first class, and Im like, Cool. Found my room that quickly. Score.
Go in take out stuff from bag.

But then psych teacher with name of flower accosts me.

Teacherwithnameofflower: Finised? *glares*
MM: Huh?
Teacherwithnameofflower: *glares some more* Finised teaching your subject everything?
MM: Say wha?
Teacherwithnameofflower: I SAW you. Outside the parking lot. I was passing there. I SAW you teaching her. Dont try to lie. I know how you people are. I SAW you.
MM: *losing it and getting snappy, I mean how much can a girl take?* Look, I wasnt teaching her, why would I be teaching her? I was studying for chrissake.
Teacherwithnameofflower: *Is taken aback at rudeness, but collects herself quickly* Then why are you late? You cant be late I say what is this. *continues to lecture for fifteen minutes*

I ignore her, wait till she's done. Then I collect my stuff from my bag, grumbling. And then I walk the entire length of the class room looking for my seat.

Which isnt there.

Because this isnt my exam hall.

Joel passes by and sees me, discreetly gestures to me through window and escorts me to my actual exam hall. I wave embarrassedly at everyone and leave. (Err... Toodles then!)

Other than that though, the exam was fantastic.
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Also, like the time I started studying for Industrial Psych at 3am, and then while looking at the xeroxed notes Jay got for me which is all I have for the entire second half of the syllabus, I realise he's xeroxed every alternate page, so nothing makes any sense. So I call him frantically, but of course he's all cosy in bed.
MM: Dude, these notes dont make any sense dude. Half the frickin pages are missing.
Jay: Oh. Yes. Mine too.
MM: Say wha? Didnt you check when you were getting it done?
Jay: Yes, but the copy I xeroxed it from was also like this.
MM: Genius. So now what?
Jay: Im studying from this only. If you try and imagine the rest of the words.. it actually works!
MM: *rolls eyes, hangs up*

So morning I decide to go to the library and fish out the book it was xeroxed from and try and read it. But I see Monkey in the foodcourt, and he has all the notes so he tells me entire second half of the syllabus in forty five minutes. And I wrote the exam based on that. Didnt do half badly either.
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Then there was when the munches and I decided to go have lunch after one grueling exam. There's this place called Fire Wok in Oasis food court. Mmm. We splurged and it was yum, and we planned and screamed and let off steam and it was nice. Mwa to the munches. Now I have to go meet them. Shar is going to do something nutty and I have to be there apparently.
What's that you say? Yes I do have an exam tomorrow... but its the last one dude. Doesnt count. Doesnt count.
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Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Why Im fraands with my fraands and Other Nonsense

I realise I havent put up fraandship day post this year like I did last time. And since Im feeling particularly mushy, I thought I might write a little one. I must digress a little here to mention how I came across this comic strip called Pearls Before Swine, I think on this blog, but I cant find it now, and that you should read it, and the crocodiles are absolutely laugh-till-your-stomach-cramps hilarious, and I like to talk like them sometimes which is why the next sentence (yes this one will end) is written the way it is:

Whys I be lykin my friendses lot so very:

Snum. Or Shar as we must start calling her or reasons I'd rather not bring to attention, if you know why already, good for you (I guess) and also because this anonymous thing's getting old dude, almost everyone who reads this blog knows who I am anyway.
(I promise, the sentences will get shorter.)
So why Shar? Apart from all the cliche stuff that is obvious (we so get each other!, we have the exact same sense of humour!, she's such a *insert name of item of confectionery here*!), it's because she sends me things like these, every once in a way. :D


I need some Shartrex! :D


Why Oshmunch? Because she buys me beautiful earrings that are just perfect, out of the blue for no reason at all. Because she's one person who gets me and why Im feeling a certain way. And she's one person whom I can talk it out to and feel better almost immediately. Because there is no way in hell I could do without her. Because we're soul sistahs. ;) And whenever I see her I just smile unconsciously. Same with Shar. It's disgusting. Whenever I stay over and wake up in the morning to the insistent beeping of all three of our alarms, Im like smiling unconsciously, the second I get up and see them there. Dude, it's morning. Im as bad tempered as a spanish bull in a bull fighting ring in the mornings, and yet I smile like a gopher. Even in the auto as we make our way toward the hellhole. It's disgusting I tell you. :)


Why Bestest? Because during our loooong conversations, in the middle while we're laughing, she'll say something like: I dont know how someone could really know you and not like you, MM. :) And that will just make my day. Eh, that's just tip of the iceberg. Plus, she sends me letters. Letters, dude.


Why FnA? Because I can fall and be sure that she will catch me. There aint no one in the world who'll look out for me like she does. I can completely pour my heart out to her and vice versa in a way that I cant with anyone else. There's so much history there. Words cannot do it.


Why Archie? Because we meet, and centuries have passed, and it's the same.


Why PS? Because he says "anyhou" s'much. Because he's intelligent, sensible, and let's face it, really funny. (Too Much Mush Alert!) And because he sends me songs (that I dont listen to immediately, but) that get stuck in my head (months afterwards). Ah, and because of the DVDs. Blessed DVDs.


Why Taru? He's so random. I love it! :D He'll just send me a message bang in the middle of the day saying something like: And here's a personalised PJ for you. How much do you measure? Ans: 1MM
And I can message him with something as obscure as "Woof" when Im bored, and he'll message back with something so clever that it's sure to have me rolling on the floor.


Why Jay? Seriously, I have NO idea. Right now Im angry with him because he's shirked off all his assignments, (leaving us to do all the work) and is off enjoying himself on a beach.
Just kidding. Im not angry. Just miffed and bitter. I jest again.
Why Jay? Well, because he's a deer.
A deer capering on a beach where I shoulda been. *pouts*
No, I'll tell you why. It's because 1. he buys me soap, 2. he carries my books, 3. he isnt in charge of anything for the lit seminar.
:) And a host of other things.


Why Im feeling all mushy mushy. Its the hormones, dude. It's ccrrrrazeh out eeya.
____________________________________________________________________

Which reminds me of a funny incident that occured outside GRE class one balmy afternoon. Osh and I were conversing outside (more like crying in relief at the class being over) when this girl walks up to me. Quite a normal thing for a girl to do, you might say? Yes, unless you are walking up to me, and positioning yourself two and a half centimetres away from my face.
I was startled, by this strange behaviour, but intrigued to see what it was all about. Was she going to tell me she had a spatial disorder? Perhaps she was blind, the poor girl. Maybe, maybe the mafia was after her, and she was seeking sanctuary, but had to be discreet about the whole thing by whispering it into my nose.

Her next words took both me and Osh (who was giggling some distance away) by shock.

"Excuse me, is there any swimming pool eeya?"

"A swimming pool eeya?" I say unflinchingly. (Did she mean in my nose?)

"Ha, swimming pool eeya."

"Ha, well no, not that Im aware of."

"No aa?"

"No, aa, perhaps you can ask someone else."

"Ok thanks ya." She smiles at my nose, and positions herself a little farther away, before walking off with her friend.

I breathe again and Osh comes back from behind the tree where she has been quietly giggling to tell me that this sort of thing has happened to her before and she believes that these people are all from a different planet, perhaps several galaxies away.

At least swimming pool girl lifted our moods considerably. Now that we were aware that there were dafter people than us around (seriously, who takes GRE classes? Esp when they eat away your weekends so), we could carry on and be happy again, and laugh and frolic and skip ourselves away from the dastardly class. Tra la la.
____________________________________________________________________

Ooo I must share this picture with you that GS sent me. Hilarious.


Once you've laughed enough at the expression of the boy receiving the vaccine, take a look at his friends behind him. They're all laughing in obvious enjoyment. There's only one fella who looks somewhat concerned, but thats only because he's next in line. :D Quite brightened my day that did.
____________________________________________________________________

I cant believe I havent blogged about the exams AT all this time. So many funny things happened.

I had a tug of war with my paper (the invigilator gave in and let me finish drawing lines.) as Zz and Shar watched in amusement from the window. I know this teacher will give me more marks if my paper looks tidy, and since Ive written utter bullcrap, Im 'na NEED to draw all the lines I can.

They were pretty strict about cheating this time. We heard this one story about a dude who had a cold and brought a handkerchief. He blew vigourously into it and then one of our teachers (who's a dear, but says "Isnt it not" too often for my fancy) decided to investigate, and proceeded to examine very careful, the entire area of the kerchief for hidden cheats.

Shar has blogged about how every time a phone rang the invigilators suddenly became meer-cats. :D

So they all pretty much sucked, esp Literary Theory and Criticism, in which I am going to spectacularly fail with single digits. It's never happened before, so Im quite looking forward to it.
____________________________________________________________________

And I have to share this link A sent me. The guy who took a Polaroid a day.
____________________________________________________________________

This is useful if you want to know about RSS feeds in Plain English.
____________________________________________________________________

This song's stuck in my head. Not the way the Beatles sang it, (that happened a long while ago) but the way this girl's sung it in Across the Universe. I Want To Hold Your Hand.
____________________________________________________________________

Ending on a croc-y note:
Dees bloggy post it haves waaaay too many linkseys in it dood. ____________________________________________________________________

Monday, June 30, 2008

Revival Post/ Blog Tag Game 2

This blog has for quite sometime been as dead as Snum in a third year OE class, and that's really saying something. So I've decided that today I must shake it out of its drugged slumber, by means of this revival post.

Overwhelmed by the number of things I have failed to document this past month and faced with a paralysing inability to pick which of these things to blog about, I have decided to complete a blog game that Snum (very ineptly) tagged me in last century.

I'm not particularly interested in this, but just thinking about the multitude of other things I have to blog about exhausts me so much I want to slide off the chair and go to sleep on the floor. So this is it. The revival post: Blog tag game 2. As I've been saying to myself a lot these days "Small steps MM, small steps."

Yo bebeh.

Blog Tag Game 2

3 JOYS
1. The sunshine on my back on a cold winter's morning. CHEESY. But it feels really good, really.
2. A biting cold wind against my cheek when Im in an auto on a cold day. Reminds me of my childhood playground days in England.
3. Finishing something, completing a task, doing it well.


3 FEARS
I used to think I was fearless. I feel fearless. Most of the time. It's a good feeling.
1. But I no like make
2. my few real fears
3. public, thankyouverymuch


3 GOALS
(Man this is boring)
1. To obtain for myself a PhD (thats, Dr. MM, to you)
2. To swim with dolphins, bungee jump, skydive
3. To see as much of the world as possible


3 CURRENT OBSESSIONS/ COLLECTIONS
Im currently not obsessed with anything really. Hmm.
Used to be with:
1. SteandKel on Youtube. I've discovered Fred (through Snum, I must give her credit or she'll come at me with a pitchfork)... he's funny once you get used to him. Very cute.
2. The Harry Potter books. Obsessed is an understatement. I think we all were at one point.
3. The Sound of Music. That movie means a lot to me. Also some TV shows: Ed, 8 Simple Rules. TV doesnt interest me as much these days.


3 RANDOM SURPRISING FACTS
(Random AND surprising. Thats asking a bit much innit?)
1. I absolutely adore anything sweet with cinnamon in it. (How surprising! I hear you say)
2. I love big butts and I cannot lie. (I jest)
3. I dont usually tell anyone this, but I detest alcohol. Presently at least. Yup. Its true. I cannot consume it without gagging. Tastes like garbage, corrodes the digestive tract and what's more, has absolutely NO EFFECT on me whatsoever, however much of it I force down. Sigh. How I have been deprived of the pleasures of life. (That'll be one Margarita mocktail please.)

And thats it. I tag Nishant, Pavan, Taru, Lalitha and La, NONE of whom will complete the task, I am pretty sure. But fly forth my children, do fly forth. :)

Saturday, May 3, 2008

I'm 20

Its true. I turned a non teenager on the 16th of April. What made my birthday this year special: (Warning: Mushy post ahead.)

Osh calling five minutes before midnight to be the first to wish me.

Snum the second. She was also the last. :)

Taru calling and playing me a three minute birthday song as soon as I picked up. :) hehehe

The gazillion calls and messages. Thanks everyone. :) :)

All the money I got from my aunts. Yeah baby! And the other gifts they gave me... sweethearts. :)

Birthday lunch and silly fun with classmates.

The Only Place. Ghost Stories. The Hand. Ebony sofas.
Taika. No Effect. Iranian Black Jacket Twin. Awkward dancing jack lookalike. Even "The party's over here..." :D

Getting lost. Knocking on doors. Talking. Making beds.

20 Feet High. Pleasant banter. Reliving old times with people I share such a strong bond with. :) Springy stepped, the Champ, FnA. :) :)

FnA and myself. Our crazy fun. Our night out. :D Our ghost pictures. Our talk about all things trivial. Our talk about all things serious. Staying up till 2.30am. I keep saying this, but words just don't do it. :)

Meeting Bestest. Being silly with Bestest. Having Bestest take uninteresting videos of me in public. Getting asked for an autograph in Gandi Bazaar when with Bestest (?? :D)

And of course my awesome gifts that made me cry. (sob!) They were so thoughtful! Brightened my day! Loved them. So much that I had to take photos of them, strange person that I am. I love you guys. :) Muahs to you all.

Bestest's: Turtle earrings (because I lost one of my old pair), wooden necklace, beautiful hand made bag, the colour xerox of the memory, the lovely lovely letter and the Goose Pillow. :) Hugs and hugs! Loved it all! Muah!


Osh's! The lovely kurta:And that little tin dabba encased a :) Beethoven

and the card I so LOVED! Thanks Munch! Muah!! :) :)Jay's. That he fretted over unnecessarily. Loved the deer card, and the beautiful shawl. :) Perfect colour, perfect everything. Thank yous jay. Muah! :) :)Snum's! LOVED it. The wallet with her photo in it, the confetti and everything. :)The card made me laugh! hahaha!And the beautiful personalised wrapping paper! Thanks ma Munch! Muah!! :) :)


And now that i have gushed enough, I take leave of you. Goodbye.

*end of mushy post*

Friday, August 10, 2007

One of those Mushy Friendship Day Posts you Find on So Many Blogs these days

... but what the hell.

It took me fifty years to write, so I cant NOT put it up now.

Bunk a day of college to catch up on work, and THIS is what I sit and do. Useless I tell you.

So anyway, this is not a post for the faint hearted. Do not embark further if you are pregnant or suffer from high blood pressure. Its mushy, voluminous, confusing, and in places, horribly boring.

Here we go.

A Happy Friendship Day to...

FnA. Ay, you know I love you ya. You're an almost-sister. We're the same. About everything. We laugh at the same silly things. No one knows what the hell is going on when they're with us. We communicate silently. We look. We get.
How we were in those days. How it was with TG and WD and the Conspirator. How we laughed. How it was with the crazy people. How we psuedo bitch about them now.
How we were with the cricket matches. How... gawsh.... how we made our life plans when we were 16.
Constant dilema: "Are we weird? Or is it just everyone else?"
Its us, man. Its us. :)
How we were at "that crucial time". How we decided to give up. How we planned what we'd do, together. How it all ended up.
How we borrow stuff from each other and forget.
How we despised tuition. How we bunked tuition. How we slept at tuition. How we gave up on tuition. How we laugh at tuition. Your birthdays, mine.
How we laugh at inconsequential stuff... your ridiculous jokes, mine, which are a tad better. How we get hysterical. Especially if its midnight.
You read this and asked me to add how I will drop something and then scream at you for being clumsy :D
Its forever you know. We'll be there for each other forever. Words dont do it.

The Champ. You also da. Midnight laughing. You "being angry". Saying funny things. Aiyo-ing about exams. Exclaming at The Other People. 20 years from now, we'll still be laughing at the same things. I can see it, clearly. Remember the cookery competition? Hahaha… and that dog near my house. J I love you for what you are- funny, warm, generous, open. Its the kind of friendship that lasts till you're old.

Archie. Our phone conversations got me through tenth man. Thank God for those 3 hour 4 times a day conversations. What'd I have done without them? There's something about you. You're gonna be really great someday, you know that? Really successful.

Springy-stepped. (Because I know how much you hate bubbly) I love the times we spent together. Lots of times. We were together almost everywhere somehow. And we got on each others nerves a bit, but I still love them... Theatre club, newspaper club, school in general :)
And I love the conversations we have now.

Overseas Friend. I'll never forget the times we spent in 6th. Manda ma'am class. And everything else. :) And I love that we're still in touch.

Tarantula Guy. You're funny. I LOVE the way you say stuff. And you're the only boy I didnt think was snot in seventh standard. Thats a huge compliment.

PS. I love our little chats. And your little narratives. And how you comment here so regularly. I'm NOT a song person okay, for your information :P It takes me a while.
You make me laugh.
Nice times we've had. And more to come :)

Bestest. Need I say anything goose? Need I? Oh alright, seeing as you're being so pushy, but this is going to take forever, let me warn you.
Our clogs, our beautiful clogs. Now tell me they weren't a good idea. Go on, I dare you. I thought of it. You, my goose, were hesitant. IN your face. Hah!
Our amoeba moments. :) Our photos. :) What crazy fun were those? :)
The 4th floor. What a place. What a place.
Your poems, my poems. I know you're thinking supermom. Goose.
Our tempers- what was that all about huh? I PU, gawsh :D The ant. The scrunched up paper.
Our TALKS. About anything that's on our minds. Anything. I love how I can blurt out anything thats in my head, absolutely anything.
Or about nothing. Nothing at all. I love how I can call you and be all blah, you'll be blah, and we'll blah together for hours.
Our geese, donks, blearghs and crappys. (God that sounds weird)
The magazine. The ass. The noah. The stories... the laptop, the poem-on-a-paper... we have to write them all down, before we forget. I think I've forgotten all of them! :(
The animal colour thing. Coffee Day Tissues. Training me to call them tissues and not what I earlier called them. :P
Reading books together.
I love how we're so in touch. I love how you know everything about me.
You remember how we used to share a red pack of Lays everyday?
Anand Bhavan. Harry Potter. Dhokla. Singing in class. Talking in class. Writing conversations in class. Being Caught in class. The Leaf Fuss. The Bubble. :) ;) :)
How Im pretty sure I'll be saying Laaunty a LOT when I'm older.
And thats just the tip of the iceberg.

GS. Serious ray of sunshine. You totally are. You physically brightened every moment of college. Really. Fun, light, goofy, happy, good natured, sunny. Never grouchy like me and la were so often. You were like the "wise person" I went to when I was clueless. You still are actually :) You knew what was going on, while still being the sunny part of the bubble that you were. I could tell you anything, I can tell you anything, and I wont be judged.
Your dress designs. :) I still have the one you made for me. :)
Amoeba people... Teddy Bear, Model... And so many more that I dont even remember now.
I told you everything that was ever bothering me. You helped. You made things fun. You did it with such ease. Everyone adored you. The second you spoke to them. Everyone, including me. You were the buffer. :)
Our serious conversations in the canteen, the bus stop. You opened my eyes :)
Dhokla, ass. Bugs urgh, apple double urgh. Hee hee hee hee. Our stories about pasts.
I am completely myself with you guys. Its like a holiday being around you.
Kee, you're pure golden sunshine.

SH. I remember that first day of college, knowing that you and I were going to be inseparable. I love your patience, your determination, your ability to work. I love how sensible and practical you are. I love how crazy you can get sometimes. But how you were altogther steady, like a rock. You were like the glue.
We loved the way your hair fell in curls at the back. And you hated it. :)
You were calm, steadying, comforting, decided.
A real gem.

Snum. My munchkin dearie! My baby, my awwwww! Thankgodthankgodthankgodthankgod you're here. You're the only one who actually gets my jokes. And vice versa. You're funny munch! We have the same lame sense of humour. We hate the same people. (What me? I dont hate anyone. That would be terrible!) We laugh and laugh and laugh when we're together, wherever we are. You make Borat's class bearable. I LOVE your(my) caricatures. (Mine. Mine. Mine)
I dont think I laugh in the same way with anyone else (Awwwwwww)
I love the mood off sleepovers at your place. (You're like, *eybrow raised*)
I love your place! I could, like, LIVE there. (You're like, uh yeah. Thats happening)
I love your clothes (You're like, hey! Thats not part of who I am! You leave my clothes out of this!)
I love the colour of your eyes! (You're like, Alright alright, stop with the flattery already. Its getting scary. Pause. *With quizzical expression* What do you really want from me?)
Gawsh the stories we make up. Green, Mantis, Hand-in-Air. Nearly peed in my pants, I did.
To sum it all up, I luuuurve you very much, my munch.


Zz. You're this really amazing personality. You really are. I've been fascinated with you ever since those hols when we started talking. You're very different. You think different. I love your poems. Especially the tears aint coming.
I love how we made up Nuards! I love how well they described things. I love how we used them around Snum just to piss her off.
I love how we split spinach canneloni everywhere, but still think sweet chariot's the best.
I love how we listen to the radio together.
I love how much we’d message each other.
I love our "tissue culture". How many of them do you still have?
I love how you're up for anything. I love how sure you are of what you think and wont think twice to make it known.
You're a darling. :)


Osho. Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhssssshhhhhhhhho. I love you Osh. You and I are so alike. So alike. What would I do without you in college? WHAT? I can whine to you, and vice versa. I can be blah with you, and vice versa. I can be upset for no reason around you, and vice versa (Snum just does not let me do that :P)
And you'll understand.
I can discuss things with you that I cant with anyone else. What things I'll not say. Hee hee hee. I love how we get freaked out about the same things.
I love how we're both so finicky about similar things.
Ay, I love that new dress you bought. Stunning is an understatement.
I love how we can do Ruby Tuesdays together. Everytime I'm doing something at college, my first thought is "Whats Osh doing?"
I love how we sit and bitch about Jay while he's there.
I love how you deonionise the onion rolls with chicken everytime you buy one.
I love your Oshsays. I love how you think pink is purple. :P
I really love how we think the same so often. I hate it when you dont come to college.
You're my sweetest lil munchkin. Muah muah muah!

Jay. Ushooo, I love you man. (At this particular moment, that is. The way things are going, if you keep excelling at things and being modest about it, Im soon going to have to hate you. I'll start a club and everything. Watch it.)
A breath of fresh air (most of the time).
You laugh at ANYTHING I say (which is what I like best about you, although it can get annoying, when Im not trying to be funny) The funniest thing about you is your TD. And please do something about your hair. Its beginning to look like Borat again.
I love how I can take your case, ALL the time. "We're friends, we CAN be rude to each other. :)" Very sportive you are. I love how I can be silly with you. Because you will invariably be sillier. :)
I love how you let me teach you songs. You're pathetic at it, by the way. Did anyone ever tell you that? You're a slow learner. :P
Nice time we had at the Hellish Place. Bugger, I hate how they liked you more than me.
You're a sweetheart. So many times you've helped me find auto in the rain or when its dark. "Dai, Good job maccha!" *punch on arm*


Tenzen, Other MM, Brat, Kk, Japkid- you make college fun!

Happy Friendship Day (Belated)! Love you all.

Monday, June 11, 2007

Hellish Experiences: Randomness

We investigated a tree cutting. Jay and I. Got invited to a house a couple of sites away from the poor tree, when we tried to find out what the public had to say on the issue ("The neighbours no, they have political influences ya. Thats why.") Thought we'd be given tea or something, but they didnt give us any, and they didnt allow us to quote them either. Turns out they were just bored because the power had gone and needed some entertainment.

We got "Ay!"ed at by someone before we left the site of the cutting. I looked straight ahead and walked on, like any sane person would. Not Jay. "Yenu?" he asked in a polite how-may-I-help-you? tone. Goose.
He got stuck there for a bit, while I hid behind a car.
Kannada or english paper? they asked, when he'd given them full details on who he was.
English, he said. (not smart Jay!), but thankfully, he wasnt beaten up or anything.
__________________________________________________________________

We went to the press club several times, attended boring conferences in accha Kannada, not understood a word that was said, and come back and written 400 word articles on them based on the literature. Dont worry, they werent published.
__________________________________________________________________

We interns had a photoshoot. Pose as if in a ragging scene. After at first vehemently refusing to be a rag-ee, I generously consented, (nobody else wanted to be) and me and Jay (he didnt even bother to argue. Knew we'd force him into it anyway) assumed our posts and presumed to look terrified at the rest of the gang even though we were laughing our heads off.
Yes, we werent very good at it. When it came out in the papers it looked as if Su2 was being ragged instead of us.
A job well done.
__________________________________________________________________

We attended this business meet at Park Hotel I think it was. It was to launch this new company that was a joint venture between two spanish companies and two Indian entreprenuers. The representatives from the Spanish companies had thick accents, and lets face it, we dont know a thing about business. Nice lunch though. There was this yum spinach and corn thing we each had 3 helpings of. Ah, the free lunches.
__________________________________________________________________

Ooo, me and Su2 were on TV once!
Wait. Dont get excited, it was only for a few seconds. We'd gone to the press club. Had drunk the coffee that corroded my innards and were watching as a fight ensued between those conducting the meet and some senior reporters. It was fun for a bit watching them shout angrily at each other, but it got boring. So I slept, you know. The way you do in class, head resting on hand. And thats when the camera arrived. Mum said when she saw it, "You were sleeping there???" and was mighty displeased, but I was listening, I swear!
__________________________________________________________________

Sunday, June 10, 2007

Hellish Experiences: Interviews

During the course of the Hellish Thing we had to do over the Summer, we interviewed Dino Morea. He was nice. Didnt even once roll his eyes at the foolish questions we threw at him.

Did he like pink clothes?
"Pink's fantastic," he said, unflinchingly.
Until he caught Su2's disgusted expression and stopped abruptly, mid grin.
What is it with people and pink? Really. They should just lay off it.

Would he rather be overdressed or underdressed to an occassion?
"Erm, I dunno, its always better to be properly dressed for any occassion, appropriately so I mean, erm... you know? Anything that fits the situation, scenario... I dont know..." *insert confused floundering look*
I dont blame him though, it was a dumb question.

And what would we catch him dressed in if we broke into his house?
*look of fear and suspicion* Were we planning on doing so?
After we assured him we most certainly would not, that we were respectable "journalists", and there was no way we would stoop to that, even if we got really desperate and unhinged (The profession can push you towards those areas), he condescended to answer.
"Um, you'd find me in bed, man."
That did not answer the question, but we giggled politely and looked expectant.
"Shorts and a T" he said. Or something of that sort, I don't remember now, it was too boring and too long ago.
Again, I dont blame him. I wouldnt have known what to say either. I would not want to be a celebrity, ever.

So those were the three dumbest questions. The rest were things like, Tell us a childhood experience in Bangalore that you cling to, and other such boring likes. He was very sweet (we were "journalists", what do you expect?), plus we were given drinks in fancy glasses and those weird snack like things to eat with tooth picks. Plus, a free bag, and in it a free T. Sadly mine was white and Extra Large. Sigh, you cant have everything.

This other time, Jay and I interviewed Charu Sharma.
You: Who?
You know, the cricket commentator who was co-host of Extraaa Innings with Mandira Bedi.
You: Aaaah.

It was late. Jay wanted to go home. But I ploughed on and said "We must, we must! What an opportunity!" He stood and talked to us for ages. It was only when Jay noticed he was massaging his back and giving us pained expressions, that we decided to stop.
We then proceeded to scour Brigade road for internet cafes so we could send off our article. It was 9pm. They were all closed or under construction or charged you 200 bucks to become a member before you could use their computers. 7 places we visited. I counted. One of them was on the 4th floor and the escalators werent working. Poor Jay, I whined the whole time.
We finally found some iffy looking place that was open, and sent it off.
Jay then sent me off in an auto, and sighed in relief.
"Until tomorrow," he must have thought. "Until tomorrow, I am free from that girl's unbearable banter."
We got a byline, which is good, after all that effort.

We came close to a third interview. We asked Anita Nair at the same book launch that we interviewed Charu Sharma, if she'd let us talk to her, but she swatted us away like flies, so we just buzzed off.

Friday, April 27, 2007

(De)press-ing Incident

As I've mentioned earlier, The Hellish Thing We HAVE to do Over the Summer has taught me a couple of things.
One of which is, People can be really dumb.

At a college where we'd gone to get info on the 1 PUC Application forms:

Us: Hello! We're coming from the press...

(Bad grammar, I know, but we wanted to make sure that they'd understand us)

Dumbman: (Interupting) Ay, what you want man? What is that?

Us: We're from *The name of the newspaper, repeated twice, loudly and clearly*

Him: Ha, so?

Us:
(thinking) So, do you WANT us to write bad reviews about your college? You absolute MORON.
(aloud) So we'd like to get a bit of informaton on the 1 PUC applications, please.

Him: You cant read the sign or what? 9 to 12 only. Come tomorrow ya.

Jay huffs out in disgust. Me and Su2 remain, persistantly determined to bore through this man's abnormally thick head.

Us: WE'RE FROM THE NEWSPAPERS!
Su2: (under her breath) Do we look like 14 year olds to you, you senseless cow? You sit in a freaking PU college the entire day, for crying out loud!

Idiot: Oh oh. Howda? Wokay. Swalpa wait madi.
(consults with fellow cow)

Us: tap shoes on concrete floor impatiently creating an ironically upbeat rhythm

Dumbman: (Interupting the rhythm in a most impolite manner)
Yinformation
ginformation yella kodakagalla.

Su2: (Under her breath) Who's asking for any ginformation?

Me: (persistantly) No, but thumba rush itha ee sati? Application forms ge?

Dumbman: (thinks) Aaaaaathara yenilla... Ashtu iralillaaaa...

Us: (momentarily astounded by the dumbness.)

How could the college place- so strategically- the dumbest employee they had?


Fellow Cow: (observing procedings and deciding to intervene)
Ha medam. Thumba rushu ithu.
(glares at Dumbman, before being called away by someone else.)

Us: (boldly) Nim College alli donation geenation yenadau idiya?

(Geenation, that kills me. How FnA and I laugh about that!)

Dumbman: Avella myangement secrets. Heng helakkagathe?

Su2: (Highly amused at the dumbness, giggles most unprofessionally)

Me: (Highly enraged at the dumbness)
So is that what you want me to put in tomorrow's paper?

Fellow Cow: (surmising trouble from afar, rushes forth and answers some of our questions, mostly with a stout: ) Gotthilla.

We left disgustedly, and spent the next 10 minutes in the auto trying to prevent Jay from calling the Cows back to "Tell them to throw themselves off a &@*%# cliff."


Thursday, April 26, 2007

The Hellish Thing We HAVE To Do Over The Summer, Goddammit.

My thoughts on it so far:

1. Bleargh.

2. There's nothing to do!

3. Thank god for Jay, Tenzen and the lot.

4. I had to smile at six random people on MG Road. Six. For the longest time, as I convinced them each that I was not a lunatic out to do stuff on the internet with the pictures we would be taking of them.
Traumatising,
it was.
But once they did understand, it was nice to see them excited at the prospect of seeing their photos in the paper the next day. It was cute even. (Awww!)

5. I have learnt how to interpret people's 'Yes', 'No', 'I dont know' answers into articulate 45 word quotes.

6. Interesting Observation:
The general tendency of the public when approached by young "journalists" on the road is as follows:
If it is "boy journalist"- Glare nastily and increase pace three-fold.
If it is "girl journalist" (smiling profusely)- Slow down, look slightly interested, listen to question and answer.
The poor old Bear. Got his ego hurt several times.
Tip: "boy journalists" must slick hair and wear suits when embarking on such expeditions.

The general tendency of the public when approached by young "journalists" on MG road:
Listen politely, smile, laugh at "journalist's" stupid jokes, be altogether quite pleasant and charming.

The general tendency of the public when approached by young "journalists" in Gandhibazaar:
General Fly-Swatting motions with hands, vehement protests, saying they're "not interested", altogether distasteful and purely miffing off behaviour.

7. Always always sneak a bite to eat while on the job.
So far, I've had:
2 one-by-two lime juices. (Silly we are, Jay and me)
The contents of Su2's lunch dabba in the back table of a restaurant so they couldnt find us out.
A strawberry-vanilla softy of which the Other MM had half.
A burger when I wasnt hungry, and when the place was "out of current" and "out of stock" on french fries and icecream, to the Tenzen's disgust.

8. The above rule applies at all times and situations, unless the places you've gone to in order to source information, are on the slightly saner side, and they politely (albeit shoe licking-ly) offer you nice cups of coffee in cute little ethnic mugs and saucers.

9. I've learned to keep out of my "mentor's" hair. Nasty it is, and styled differently everyday.

10. I've learned that some people are just plain DUMB. (refer upcoming posts)