Did I ever mention the mad squirrel I once encountered?
Well, I was sprawled out on the sofa in the living room one particularly drowsy afternoon, and the curtains were drawn. No one was home and I was just about to fall into a nice little slumber,when I heard a rapping sound. I sat up. The noise would not stop and it was beginning to bother me.
It was a constant, unrelenting loud tapping noise. It seemed to come from somewhere behind the curtains.
Cautiously, I pull them back. And on the other side of the glass, I am faced with a squirrel, who is, staring back at me.
The staring doesnt seem to affect his paw movement though. He can stare and knock at the glass at the same time. A multi talented squirrel.
I know your reaction is "Awww! How cute! Did you take a picture? The darling little thing! How absolutely adorable!"
But no. No. Not this squirrel. Definitely not.
This squirrel had a mad glint in its eyes. That, accompanied by the unnerving staring and simultaneous tapping, totally freaked me out.
Any normal, sane squirrel would have fled at the first movement of the curtains. Not this squirrel. This squirrel wanted to get in.
What for? If it was raining, I'd've understood. I'd've gladly let it in and provided it refreshments and shelter until the rain subsided. But it was a perfectly sunny day. Who knows what ulterior motives this weird squirrel had. I wasnt going to let it in and steal all the electronic goods. Or allow it to murder me or something.
(Really. It looked vicious.)
Helpless and not knowing what to do, I phoned my mum to ask her advice. At least they'd have some idea what happened if they got home and found me gagged and unconscious on the sofa.
"Mum, there's this squirrel, and he's staring at me and I think he's mad!" I blurt out as soon as she picks up.
"What? What's that? A squirrel?" annoyed voice "I'm in a meeting, Madhu. Just scare it away. I'm sure you're capable of scaring a squirrel away."
"No!" I try to explain "But this one's a mad squi..."
So much for that. Well they'd be sorry when they'd find later how the squirrel managed to bore through the glass with those razor like teeth of his and get at me.
Muttering a little, I pick up a newspaper and chuck it at the squirrel. A sane squirrel would've run for it. Blinked even. Not this one.
I try and scare it with sudden movements. The neighbours must have thought I was performing some kind of weird dance ritual.
I tap back at it through the window.
Believe me, any other squirrel'd have been dead with fright.
Not this one.
The newspaper and dancing only angered it further and it began squeaking.
I decided to ignore it. Switched the TV on, tried to find something on National Geographic about how squirrels are easy prey for owls or something. Thought I'd try and scare its wits out.
It left, finally. Got bored I think, since I was no longer acting hysterically.
Good riddance, the mad little thing.
Coming and frightening me out of my sleep. Who does it think it is?